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Today in court Judge : State your name? Me : Not Guilty Judge : What? Me : I had it legally changed. Judge : Your Not Guilty? Me : "moonwalks outta there"
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
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Corny Joke Warning on 01:00 - Sep 25 with 10211 views
A bloke gets a new job and goes shopping to a clock shop. " Excuse me, do you have a potato clock? Assistant " a what sir " Bloke says " a potato clock " The assistant, somewhat baffled, says " I don't there is such a thing" "Well" says the bloke, " my new boss told me I start at 9, so get up at 8 o clock"
The grass is always greener.
1
Corny Joke Warning on 15:48 - Sep 25 with 9963 views
Corny Joke Warning on 15:28 - Sep 25 by Esox_Lucius
A bloke gets a new job and goes shopping to a clock shop. " Excuse me, do you have a potato clock? Assistant " a what sir " Bloke says " a potato clock " The assistant, somewhat baffled, says " I don't there is such a thing" "Well" says the bloke, " my new boss told me I start at 9, so get up at 8 o clock"
Me probably being thick but that’s gone straight over my head?
favourite cheese mature Cheddar. FFS there is no such thing as the EPL
The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall. The owner asks the clerk, "What's with that guy over there by the wall?" The clerk says, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn't find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative."
"You idiot! You can't treat a cough with laxatives!"
"Oh yeah? Look at him, he's too terrified to cough!"
The grass is always greener.
1
Corny Joke Warning on 21:41 - Sep 26 with 9650 views
Mother : "How was school today Johnny?" Johnny : "It was really great mum. Today we made explosives!" Mother : "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. What will you do at school tomorrow?" Johnny : "What school?"
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
3
Corny Joke Warning on 08:30 - Sep 27 with 9551 views
A family of aliens were trying to decide where to go for their annual vacation. One of them suggested Earth in the Milky Way galaxy but the others declined saying that it only had one star.