Advise Please (HR Related ) 12:52 - Jan 5 with 24766 views | paulparker | ok so at work we have a woman who is very, very , very racist and outspoken I have now clashed with this woman as she has been "bullying" other people and I cannot sit by and watch that ( I hate bullys) , to the trained eye I look like the aggressor because i stood up for her and told her to f off as a male I can see how this looks I have now made a complaint to the upper management about her "comments " about other races , some of it is very near the knuckle now am I wrong to do this? have I opened up a huge can of worms for myself most of the office floor are blanking me as anyone else had to do this ? | |
| And Bowles is onside, Swinburne has come rushing out of his goal , what can Bowles do here , onto the left foot no, on to the right foot
That’s there that’s two, and that’s Bowles
Brian Moore
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 18:55 - Jan 5 with 3590 views | smegma | If I was in your shoes I'd use the video option on a phone/tablet. | | | |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 21:57 - Jan 5 with 3517 views | isawqpratwcity | PP, we're usually on opposing sides of the argument but I am very concerned for you here. Unless losing your job is an acceptable option, you need to seek expert help immediately. The people charged with sorting this out will not necessarily be looking to find who is right or wrong, they will be seeking the quickest way to make this mess go away. If that means casting you as the villain in the piece, they'll do it. Your union father-in-law would be a good place to start (do what you have to to smooth that out at home) but you will need advice from an expert with experience in office situations like this. Good luck. | |
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 22:11 - Jan 5 with 3505 views | 2Thomas2Bowles |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 21:57 - Jan 5 by isawqpratwcity | PP, we're usually on opposing sides of the argument but I am very concerned for you here. Unless losing your job is an acceptable option, you need to seek expert help immediately. The people charged with sorting this out will not necessarily be looking to find who is right or wrong, they will be seeking the quickest way to make this mess go away. If that means casting you as the villain in the piece, they'll do it. Your union father-in-law would be a good place to start (do what you have to to smooth that out at home) but you will need advice from an expert with experience in office situations like this. Good luck. |
Well I have to agree here with isawqpratwcity (shock horror) The world is full of backstabbers. | |
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 22:42 - Jan 5 with 3470 views | PunteR | Blimey.. Office work and site work seem centuries away from each other. I'm sure things will work out PP. My advise for what its worth is just keep your head down for a bit. If shes as bad as you say she'll get found out. Now you've called her out she may even be looking to move on herself. Hope it sorts itself out mate. | |
| Occasional providers of half decent House music. |
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 22:52 - Jan 5 with 3458 views | danehoop |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 18:52 - Jan 5 by johncharles | As Bazza says any multinational will be very wary of being accused of racism. They are bound to have a complaints procedure and they will to follow this to the latter. Make sure they do. I'd ask for a copy of this procedure just to let them know that you're on the case. At any interview /hearing you are allowed to have someone present as a witness on your side. A union rep would be great but you can have anyone you like. One of your mates might be a .....a local councillor ? 😲 Don't worry about upsetting the company. The quieter you are the better for them Paul we've had some right argy bargies on here but this woman must have been well out order to upset you. |
This is some sound advice, along with the importance of keeping a record of what happened, when it happened and who else was present.If you are interviewed it is always good practice to have another person present at any meeting - that can be anyone of your choice. Sends a strong message to those concerned that you are taking it seriously - especially if they have a legal or other background which is likely to make the company be careful about what they do. Your company should have bullying, harrasment and conduct/discipline procedures readily available to all staff ( quite possibly along with whistle blowing procedures as well). Normally you would expect these to lay out the process of how to raise a complaint and what process will be followed through any complaint. Quite a number of constructive dismissal cases actually find in favour of the employee because the company fails to follow its own procedures properly. So that in respect it is quite helpful if you are aware of people being interviewed and time being spent through that process. But equally do ensure that you have a clear understanding of that process being followed, including things like timelines for investigations and who should be involved. | |
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 23:58 - Jan 5 with 3402 views | nix | Some really good advice here PP. I agree with Isaw though, the company will try to resolve it with the least hassle to them, especially as they sound to be really weak managers; they really won’t care about the rights and wrongs or their duty of care to those being bullied. The more ammunition you have, in terms of advice from ACAS, documented evidence, TU support etc, the stronger position you will be in. Good for you for standing up to this woman and her croneys. Some of the things you reported her as saying made me feel quite sick. No wonder you can’t stand it. | | | |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 08:42 - Jan 6 with 3273 views | Harbour | Well done for standing up to the bully I hate bullies and racist behaviour must be stamped out. If the company is large or medium sized they should have policies that cover discrimination and harassment and it sounds like the type of behaviour you describe would be in flagrance of such policies I would point this out to your HR department who should with management investigate your complaint and take action. | | | |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 09:51 - Jan 6 with 3238 views | QPR_Jim | Good luck PP, sounds like you're doing the right thing. Won't be easy but by the sounds of things if you didn't act you would have had to live with it eating away at you at work and/or had to find somewhere else to work. Hope it pans out right for you and the bully gets what she deserves. | | | | Login to get fewer ads
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 12:59 - Jan 6 with 3142 views | Snipper | Some great advice given on here. Regarding the advice of recording the incidents on iPhone or tablet, how about one of those secret cameras hidden in a clock or ornament. I think they’re called nanny cams. I work on London Underground, and we have numerous union reps who’ve represented people outside of the Underground. Especially with what you’re up against pp. Feel free to PM me at any time. | | | |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 14:21 - Jan 6 with 3075 views | kensalriser | Good luck pp. Staying silent on this sort of thing is as good as supporting it, so total respect from me for your stance. I can't add much to all the good advice, but one very important thing is don't lose your rag no matter what. | |
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 23:51 - Jan 6 with 2961 views | Neil_SI | Sorry to hear about these unfortunate experiences PP. I’ve dealt with a lot of difficult people and situations over the years at work, so I’d like to offer my two pence and thoughts, which may be of some use. The hardest part for most people in situations like these is removing emotion and assumption when raising complaints and maintaining that stance throughout, which isn’t easy as we’re all human. Whatever is put forward should be factual and without prejudice, but keep in mind that your interpretation of what something is or isn’t, however blindingly obvious it is to you, still may be different to others. You mentioned this person was “very, very, very, very racist and outspoken”, but what does that actually mean? She is either racist or she isn’t. She may have also made racist comments, but may not be a racist, which is an area that is subjective and people will hold different views. Likewise, there is nothing wrong with being “outspoken”. The reason I asked the above is not to question you, but to help you identify the area of concern you want to approach your bosses/HR with. From what you’ve said, there has been repeated racist comments being made, which is more alarming than someone being an absolute idiot and letting themselves down on one occasion. You can use that leverage as part of building your case, because consistency is a huge factor. The complaint should focus on what you perceive as “racist” comments and you’re seeking validation from management that your perception of this action is correct, and if so, what the companies procedure is for dealing with this. You can do the same with “bullying” although that becomes even more subjective, so you want to ensure it’s clear and with as minimal fluff and grey areas as possible. But the consistency of these actions can also justify why your concern has become magnified, especially with the perceived lack of action being taken. If your company has a code of conduct that explains about behavioural expectations at work and what may breach them, or be something that is considered gross misconduct, then you can pick these out and tally them with your complaint and what your perception of what constitutes a violation of those terms. You can then seek confirmation whether they agree with you that your assessment is accurate or not, and turn the tables on them in order to give you a response. Here you can hold the company and bosses/HR accountable to their own code of conduct, and demonstrate where they are or aren’t meeting them. But, don’t get involved with what the appropriate level of action is, it should be stated on the code of conduct, and it’s for them to worry about at this point. Sometimes in these cases, you will eventually end up improving internal processes from clarification, which may or may not be to your liking, but will give everybody clarity on what is and isn’t acceptable. The trick here is the balance is sensitive, if the company is too soft, it can hurt them as they are allowing bad behaviour to persist and indicating to staff that it’s acceptable, which can cause more problems in the long run. Focus on how this makes YOU feel, not the victim of the racist comments. It is not for you to say how it impacts them, because you will never fully know. By focusing on how it makes YOU feel, management have a responsibility to address that and they cannot dispute how YOU feel. It’s clearly making you “stressed” and “unhappy” and these are the kind of terms that are dangerous for companies to let slide if an employee says them. Likewise, it’s also important that you do not assassinate your own character publicly to the people involved or management, which is in reference to you saying “as a bald headed, bloating fella I look to the trained eye like a Chelsea fan hence I look like the aggressor”. That would be making assumptions on how others perceive you, which have nothing to do with the complaint you’re raising and should have no bearing whatsoever. What you can do is perform a post mortem with your own behaviour and how you handled the situation. You can justify why you swore at this lady because you became upset by her behaviour and how it made you feel, but you can also accept that you handled this unprofessionally and show remorse and even apologise for this particular part, but not your resentment for her actions. A better way would have been simply to raise the complaint directly without any altercation. This demonstrates that you are rational, reasonable and can hold yourself accountable for your own behaviour and go some way to prove this is not just a personal issue between you and this lady. In addition, if you are raising your complaint in person, always follow up on email with a summary of what was discussed (including your one on ones). They will respond and correct you if your take on the discussion wasn’t accurate in their view, and then you can debate that further if necessary, but if they don’t reply, then that is likely to work more in your favour over a period of time depending on how things play out. You’ll be able to demonstrate that action wasn’t taken within a reasonable timeframe (you can even clarify what a reasonable time frame is for responses), or at all, or only after had to repeatedly chase what should be considered a serious complaint. Again, and you may just be posting this stuff for background information here, but try not to make assumptions publicly to your bosses about their intent. You mentioned they didn’t want to get involved because the work you do is very complex and it would be nigh on impossible to train anyone to do this if someone left or was fired, but this shouldn’t be considered as part of your own case. The reality here is your colleagues could get run over by a bus, so there is a wider business risk that the company as a whole needs a better contingency plan for. Again, this shows a bigger picture mentality and demonstrates a duty and care for the company and the working environment, which you and everybody else want to be healthy in order to give yourselves the best conditions to achieve success. The problem I see that you have right now is a lack of actual hard evidence, which is why it makes the situation difficult to deal with. You need to encourage those who have witnessed this to approach management and share their perspective (which may or may not have happened), or you need to have hard evidence to demonstrate the problem clearly. You might want to have a conversation with the victims directly and tell them how this ladies behaviour towards them makes YOU feel. That may indirectly encourage them to approach management themselves. Sometimes this approach is better than telling somebody to stand up for themselves, or come across as feeling sorry for them because it reinforces that they’re weak and being bullied. If you show your own empathy you’ll be surprised how often people follow because they can relate to that and be on the same wavelength. Alternatively, you might want to approach your bosses/HR as a collective, so that you can express your concerns together as a group, and that may also be a better way for those who are scared to do it alone. If you don’t have this, then it falls into a category of one persons word against another, and generally there are no winners in this scenario. It’s difficult for management to take action without hard evidence, especially when they may suspect that there is personal dislike between the parties involved. You have also said that they’ve spoken to some of the affected parties, but again, you are making assumptions about the content and outcome of these private conversations. The reality is you don’t know what has or hasn’t been said in them and the amount of time these conversations have taken are not an indicator of anything. Don’t let it cloud your own perspective. Maybe you could ask those victims for a chat over coffee and find out more? You should also consider clarifying expectations around timeframes for responses and eventual outcomes for next steps in every conversation with your bosses/HR, whether it’s making a formal complaint or in your one on ones. You can follow this up in writing as well and while this can seem a bit robotic and corporate, once you do this, often you find it puts people under pressure to do something because it’s logged and recorded and they know they have to react appropriately. On a semi related note, I once did jury service for 3 weeks on a case that involved accusations of violence and rape and it was astonishing to see how 12 seemingly very reasonable people all had different views of what rape actually was. On the surface, you’d think that an accusation of rape would be easy to conclude, but the reality was the technicality was far more complex and it certainly made me re-evaluate my own interpretation. In the end, it’s up to you what you are willing to put up with and accept. You’ll need to be clear and honest about that with yourself. If you are really unhappy then you can always leave, and while that can seem like a scary and horrible prospect because of the unknown, you also have to be very careful about how unhappy and miserable you can end up in a situation like this and the impact it can have on your health. So, at some point, ask yourself whether it’s really worth staying and what type of action, outcome and working environment is going to make it so for you. Hope that helps in some way. Good luck. p.s. I left behind my life’s body of work after 15 years at the same company recently and moved elsewhere. I haven’t regretted the decision at all, it’s been a breath of fresh air and just what I needed, so it can be done. [Post edited 7 Jan 2018 1:56]
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 00:24 - Jan 7 with 2932 views | NW5Hoop | Good for you, paulparker. Hope it all works out the right way. | | | |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 12:17 - Jan 10 with 2718 views | paulparker | ok , a quick update here the bigot has made a counter claim against me for threatening behaviour (no surprise) one of the bosses has asked me to do a mediation session with her and HR to "iron these differences out" is this the companies way of trying to sweep it under the carpet or do I do this and let her do the talking and hope she hangs her self or do I let her carry on and hope people come out and back my side of the story | |
| And Bowles is onside, Swinburne has come rushing out of his goal , what can Bowles do here , onto the left foot no, on to the right foot
That’s there that’s two, and that’s Bowles
Brian Moore
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 12:45 - Jan 10 with 2675 views | 2Thomas2Bowles |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 12:17 - Jan 10 by paulparker | ok , a quick update here the bigot has made a counter claim against me for threatening behaviour (no surprise) one of the bosses has asked me to do a mediation session with her and HR to "iron these differences out" is this the companies way of trying to sweep it under the carpet or do I do this and let her do the talking and hope she hangs her self or do I let her carry on and hope people come out and back my side of the story |
No surprise she has made herself out the victim You bully you sob sob Yeah they want you to sort it out between you which means they won't discipline her Weak HR and not looking like you have support from other staff. not a lot you can do. You stood up to be counted, now you just have to think about yourself. [Post edited 10 Jan 2018 12:49]
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 12:56 - Jan 10 with 2651 views | BazzaInTheLoft |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 12:17 - Jan 10 by paulparker | ok , a quick update here the bigot has made a counter claim against me for threatening behaviour (no surprise) one of the bosses has asked me to do a mediation session with her and HR to "iron these differences out" is this the companies way of trying to sweep it under the carpet or do I do this and let her do the talking and hope she hangs her self or do I let her carry on and hope people come out and back my side of the story |
Tell the truth as you've told us, but without losing your rag and you'll be fine I reckon. I know you aren't a member of a Union but get signed up sharpish. Unite cover the construction industry (I'm sure that's what you said) http://www.unitetheunion.org/growing-our-union/joinunite/ I'm a Union rep myself. I act the dickhead on here but I am occasionally serious. Feel free to privately message me if you need. [Post edited 10 Jan 2018 13:00]
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 12:57 - Jan 10 with 2646 views | hopphoops |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 12:17 - Jan 10 by paulparker | ok , a quick update here the bigot has made a counter claim against me for threatening behaviour (no surprise) one of the bosses has asked me to do a mediation session with her and HR to "iron these differences out" is this the companies way of trying to sweep it under the carpet or do I do this and let her do the talking and hope she hangs her self or do I let her carry on and hope people come out and back my side of the story |
Not an expert here, but Neil's advice seems really excellent and this mediation session seems like a great opportunity in different ways. I agree that the best thing is to focus on the behaviour not the person. Have the mindset that the solution is not for you or her to leave, but for her to end the actions or behaviour which you think unacceptable. Be ready to apologize openly for your reaction; make clear it is you that is offended by what she says. Make clear that if that changes you'll be fine working with her. All this will put you on the front foot and in line with the company's route to a solution. If she and they go on to do nothing then you will have the choice of leaving or taking further formal action. Keep records in the interim. NB if you say "I'm only speaking for myself; when Jane calls John a junglebunny it offends me and makes me uncomfortable in my work" and she says it's just bantz, then you've got them. Others more expert will advise on whether to be accompanied / who by / how to record the session etc. | |
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 12:58 - Jan 10 with 2642 views | 2Thomas2Bowles |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 12:56 - Jan 10 by BazzaInTheLoft | Tell the truth as you've told us, but without losing your rag and you'll be fine I reckon. I know you aren't a member of a Union but get signed up sharpish. Unite cover the construction industry (I'm sure that's what you said) http://www.unitetheunion.org/growing-our-union/joinunite/ I'm a Union rep myself. I act the dickhead on here but I am occasionally serious. Feel free to privately message me if you need. [Post edited 10 Jan 2018 13:00]
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And take some hankies for when she turns on the tears as she hands round photos of her with her black "friends" [Post edited 10 Jan 2018 13:00]
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 14:25 - Jan 10 with 2504 views | Brightonhoop | Much depends upon what out come you want. It sounds like the Co would prefer to sweep it away, and as they have not called you in on misconduct sounds like you are left in a strong position afterall despite the counter claim. I think I would be wary of that situation initially with her and HR as you will be revealing your hand. So I would email HR stating you are aware a complaint/counter claim has been made against you and would welcome the opportunity to clear your name, not in her presence, with HR exclusively. And press home that you swore out of expaseration, not aggression highlighting how long and often it has gone on and the Companies lack of facility to complain/poor mangement of her from above. Assert that, say she's not being Managed. I'd also say in a way to support the HR that whilst you would be unlikely to take them to task at a Tribunal but unless they sort it out, someone will sooner or later because she is out of control. Use the words she uses, 'spear chuckers' et al and ask them, tell them how offensive they are, derogatory and so far outside employment law that a good Employment Lawyer would have a field day, asserting you dont want to see the Company you're working for in that mess because it is only her where you're finding problems. Assert she is a bully, and that others wont speak up through fear, and re=assert you are not aggressive and want the accusation withhdrawn. I'd also require she was sent on various Trainings relating to not bullying in the work place, what is acceptable language etc and ask them directly, why does she feel the need to be derogatory to people she is managing based on race? A good manager doesn't need to do those things. Based on anything. And say you'll agree to reconcilliation once she's had suitable re-training. If there's been no staff surveys etc on Employee Satisfation point these out, if you dont have a third party complaints proceedure point it out. Ask, where should I take a legitimate complaint without fear of reprisal because it's not sign posted? If there's been no training on anti-bullying or racism in the work lace for years, point it out. And point to your own decent record as well. Good luck. [Post edited 10 Jan 2018 14:29]
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 14:37 - Jan 10 with 2485 views | RangersDave | Be careful mate, record the hr meeting, and above all if she’s allowed to have a friend with her as support, you damn well make sure you have one too. Your entitled if she is. Once done in the meeting, spend a few hours transcribing the recording into a hard copy so that if it goes further, you have, word for word, proof of what was said. This is very important as hr don’t like ‘bullies’ who act against women, as (and I’m sorry to generalise) the guy will go into a meeting as the underdog, and as such, they may try to manipulate things against you, you nasty nasty man, lol. So they might précis the meeting and conveniently miss stuff off (or to be fair, by accident) and this way you cover your butt. Even more important if hr is a woman, (I know, I know) as meetings like this tend to get ‘slanted’ against the man. If it is hr person (woman) plus a second woman plus complainant, get the meeting adjourned until it’s a hr woman and man, plus complainant stating sexual fairness in the hearing. Again record it all. | |
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 14:54 - Jan 10 with 2464 views | paulparker | Top advice fellas , thanks once again ive agreed to the "mediation" as my boss thinks it looks good from my part that im "willing" to resolve the issues she also thinks she is running scared , part of me doesn't want to do it and go straight to a hearing and have her , so to speak my plan is to let her do the talking and hopefully she hangs herself, what I don't want to do is reveal my hand to her as I have documented pretty much everything over a 3 year period and a lot of it would see her never work again , I will be recording this on my phone funny enough we do have a company survey as the company im working for is trying to crack the 100 top companies list (the irony) on my survey I complained about the bullying and racist behaviour which has allowed to continue , but again nothing I am now joining the union as I still think this will escalate further than the mediation she is running scared and is doing everything to save her skin , this woman is ar s e licking around everyone like you wouldn't believe this has made me more determined to see this through | |
| And Bowles is onside, Swinburne has come rushing out of his goal , what can Bowles do here , onto the left foot no, on to the right foot
That’s there that’s two, and that’s Bowles
Brian Moore
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 15:23 - Jan 10 with 2416 views | BazzaInTheLoft |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 14:54 - Jan 10 by paulparker | Top advice fellas , thanks once again ive agreed to the "mediation" as my boss thinks it looks good from my part that im "willing" to resolve the issues she also thinks she is running scared , part of me doesn't want to do it and go straight to a hearing and have her , so to speak my plan is to let her do the talking and hopefully she hangs herself, what I don't want to do is reveal my hand to her as I have documented pretty much everything over a 3 year period and a lot of it would see her never work again , I will be recording this on my phone funny enough we do have a company survey as the company im working for is trying to crack the 100 top companies list (the irony) on my survey I complained about the bullying and racist behaviour which has allowed to continue , but again nothing I am now joining the union as I still think this will escalate further than the mediation she is running scared and is doing everything to save her skin , this woman is ar s e licking around everyone like you wouldn't believe this has made me more determined to see this through |
This is lefty talk PP! Me and LBlock are meeting up tomorrow to chain ourselves to the door of Starbucks in protest at the treatment of Diane Abbott and we have plenty of lentils to go round so come and join us! : ) | | | |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 15:39 - Jan 10 with 2393 views | swisscottage | One piece of advice. Keep a journal. Note down every occurrence of discriminatory or bullying behavior. Note down the people involved, time, place, and what was said. Note down the bearing and behavior of all parties involved. Do not do this in front of her. Do not provoke or confront her unless absolutely necessary. Always raise things through your line manager first before making an official complaint through formal disciplinary procedures. Note in your journal when you made a compliant through your line manager. IF you're in a big company these procedures should be available to you. IF you are going to step in, make sure you do it respectfully even though she may not deserve it. Use a moderated tone, do not use derogatory, defamatory, or inflammatory language. Be very careful not to use aggressive or threatening body language. This is especially important as a male confronting a female. If confronting her seriously consider recording the confrontation on your phone without making it evident, to ensure you can backup your version of events. Do not count on any work colleagues backing you up. Most people are sheep and won't want to get involved. By you yourself calling her a f..ng racist in front of the office and using disrespectful tones can open you up to disciplinary proceedings... especially if she is the sort of person that knows how to manipulate the HR system. Most HR hate these sorts of things, and they do everything they can to protect their back and the company as opposed to resolve the underlying issue. | | | |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 15:43 - Jan 10 with 2389 views | 2Thomas2Bowles | my plan is to let her do the talking and hopefully she hangs herself, what I don't want to do is reveal my hand to her as I have documented pretty much everything over a 3 year period and a lot of it would see her never work again I'm not sure that's the right thing to do, this is mediation, not a disciplinary. Any evidence you have I think would be better handed to HR before as it may look like you are trying to ambush her. but I'm no expert. [Post edited 10 Jan 2018 15:52]
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 15:53 - Jan 10 with 2374 views | paulparker | I don't want to do the mediation but my "boss" thinks that by me not doing it im showing myself as the person who is in the wrong because she apparently leapt at the chance, I plan on saying that "spear chucker " etc makes me feel uncomfortable and that I don't want to be around that language or be around people being bullied hopefully with this tactic she goes down the route of "its banter" or "ive taken it the wrong way" etc that way she drops herself in it if it goes further the funny thing is she effs and jeffs like a navvy and had a stand up row with our credit manager the other week resulting in them having a ding dong outside the premises this woman is a hypocrite of the highest order | |
| And Bowles is onside, Swinburne has come rushing out of his goal , what can Bowles do here , onto the left foot no, on to the right foot
That’s there that’s two, and that’s Bowles
Brian Moore
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Advise Please (HR Related ) on 15:59 - Jan 10 with 2361 views | 2Thomas2Bowles |
Advise Please (HR Related ) on 15:53 - Jan 10 by paulparker | I don't want to do the mediation but my "boss" thinks that by me not doing it im showing myself as the person who is in the wrong because she apparently leapt at the chance, I plan on saying that "spear chucker " etc makes me feel uncomfortable and that I don't want to be around that language or be around people being bullied hopefully with this tactic she goes down the route of "its banter" or "ive taken it the wrong way" etc that way she drops herself in it if it goes further the funny thing is she effs and jeffs like a navvy and had a stand up row with our credit manager the other week resulting in them having a ding dong outside the premises this woman is a hypocrite of the highest order |
She will be all sweetness and light and will fight dirty. You will be Mr Nasty, you can bank on her playing it that way. | |
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