The Weston Report: Party Time As Rams Overdose On Goals At iPro!

If every game at the ‘iPro’ stadium turns out like this one, then someone from the ticket office better just click renew on my season ticket until they get notification that I’m pushing up daisies.

From the hard-fought and last-gasp efforts of mid-week, this was in stark contrast as Derby punished Blackpool’s own mid-week indiscipline and subsequent make-shift backline to take maximum points for the third time in six days.

A little surprisingly, the Rams were unchanged from the side that beat Boro, with the squad obviously better-equipped to deal with two games in four days than yours truly, whose Wednesday-night-artic-wind-induced man flu almost made me watch from the warmth of the sofa.

After a brew, a bowl of Shreddies, (other breakfast cereals are available) and a late fitness-test, I was declared good to go, hoping that there may be a bottle of our new stadium sponsors’ brand under my seat to help further. Not so, but there was a minutes applause for Nelson Mandela.

My decision looked flawed as after three minutes, the visitors took the lead in all-too familiar and unwelcome fashion. A needless foul by Forsyth in the back of former Ram Steve Davies gave Ince the change to swing in a free-kick. You will see many better this weekend, but that didn’t stop Osbourne chancing his arm, flicking the ball on and seeing his optimism rewarded with the opener, flashing past Grant into the corner.

New stadium name. Very old problem.

Not that it seemed to deter the 24,000 odd, who had obviously been treated to some of the isotonic treat and were up for the fight. The same looked likely of the Tangerines in the early exchanges, limiting the Rams to just a Hughes free-kick wide in the opening fifteen.

The openings though, were coming, with pockets of space readily available. Patience then was to be key, unlike the ‘Kiss me quick’ approach of the visitors, with very little offensive action due to the poor distribution of those in Tangerine. Davies though, undeterred by the songs from the back of the South Stand (again, as in Wednesday’s report, I couldn’t possibly repeat them) was winning his fair share, with little support.

What can’t be condoned though was his comical handball on the touchline, literally catching the ball before it was out of play, much to the amusement of the hairy man in front of me.

It seemed like one of those afternoons akin to that of finding something troublesome in your teeth-it would take time to get a satisfactory outcome. Forsyth and then Wisdom provided good quality into the box to be matched by more quality last-ditch defending. The final ball was proving problematic in avoiding a toe of those in Tangerine, with Bishop in particular defending excellently.

There was almost a training game feel, with a glut of corners and possession for the Rams which were time and again coming to nought. This wasn’t for the best efforts of Dawkins, whose quick feet saw him shoot over, before a jink in the box saw a cut-back to Martin, only for Bishop to provide more biblical defending and smother the effort before Ward smashed wide from the follow-up. Ever the threat, the Tottenham loanee then provided the chance of the half for Bryson, who scooped over inside the six-yard box.

A similar pattern followed throughout the remainder of the half, with Blackpool excused for thinking that they were at home on the North Sea, as Derby created wave after wave of chances. At half-time though, the flood defences were standing strong and despite boasting a crazy 72% of possession, the Rams were behind.

The sight of Johnny Russell warming up at half-time was no great shock, given that the one poor performer of the first-period was Jamie Ward, who was having one of those little-man syndrome games, blaming everyone but himself for some less than brilliant passing.

No surprise then that he was summoned to McClaren’s office for lines during the second-half, with the Scot his like-for-like replacement. The mood was one of optimism despite being a goal down, with us obviously saving a treat for the Sky viewers in the second-half.

Now I’m not sure, how many or if any bottles of iPro were consumed during the interval but one thing is for sure:-whatever was said or done in the dressing room needs to be digested for the rest of the season.

Within forty seconds, the Rams had a penalty after Martin, played in by Wisdom, went down under a tangle. Quicker than you could say ‘Jack Robinson’, the referee had pointed to the spot and Martin was given 6.0 from the Russian judge, before coolly slotting home to restore parity. A goal, one sensed, which might just turn the tide.

To their credit, the visitors looked to hit straight back, forcing a couple of free-kicks and trying to gain at least 30% of possession. Sadly for Blackpool, their Towering miss-mash defence finally buckled to gift us a lead.

A speculative ball from Wisdom was cut out, before Basham inexplicably headed straight to Dawkins. Gilks, carrying a fair bit of timber for a goalkeeper, did well to thwart him but could only present Martin with an early Christmas gift and via a deflection, the hit-man had his and the Rams’ second.

A third almost arrived within two minutes. A classic counter saw Grant catch and ping the ball from Ince Jr’s corner straight to Russell, whose control and vision was excellent to find that man Dawkins again. With Blackpool defenders back-pedalling more than when they set eyes on the big-dipper at the Pleasure Beach, the winger was desperately unlucky to see his shot fizz wide.

Pride Park…whoops sorry the iPro was in full-voice, with the atmosphere one of the best of the season, rewarded with a killer third goal just thirteen minutes into the second half. More excellent approach play saw Dawkins play the ball in-behind the full-back to Wisdom, providing his most-attacking display of his loan spell.

Thankfully, the attack didn’t go the same way as his BMW, with no mud in sight as his ball hit Bryson and rolled into the corner. Quite how much our Duracell Bunny knew about it is up for debate, but the cheeky smile suggested it was messy rather than Messi.

3-1 and it was game over, despite the close score line and Davies producing a good stop from Grant following a set-piece. Small bits of candy-floss for the seasiders though, as the Rams continued to dominate. A yard quicker in midfield and with Buxton impressively snuffing out the odd threat, it was little surprise when we increased our numerical advantage further.

The Tower of Tangerine wasn’t so much as cracking but crumbling into pieces as the effervescent Dawkins was set free after another brilliant Russell pass. Bursting into the box and with Bryson waiting for a tap-in square, Bishop found himself with little alternative to take the attackers trailing leg to concede another penalty. Harshly for the defender, it was checkmate as he received his marching orders. Martin then had a chance for the first hat-trick since way back… at the New Den in September.

In almost identical fashion, the big number 9 despatched with aplomb to score the first hat-trick of his career and the first hat-trick ever at the iPro…

Time for the excellent Buxton to give Michael Keane his debut, although one hopes that McLaren resists the urge to swap roles next time out.

After the chaos witnessed since the interval, the game then returned to the same serene, Ram dominant pattern. We really were knocking it around for fun, the ole’s from the crowd testament to more lovely football.

At one point, I did think that they had smuggled a Donkey on to control the onslaught, but thankfully it transpired to just be Barry Ferguson trawling around midfield.

Hendrick replaced the workmanlike Eustace, before Forsyth, who looks a different player, go agonizingly close with a right-footed swinger. You got the feeling that there were six or seven goals available, but maybe the exploits of the week had finally gotten to the Rams, who were content just to keep the ball.

The game was petering out until Keogh burst forwards and was needlessly scythed down by Angel Martinez, for him to see a second yellow card and one can imagine, the bottom side of Paul Ince’s size tens.

There was still time for the skipper to come to the party and for the icing to be put on a very edible looking cake with chocolate sprinkles, jam, sponge and custard, scoring a goal on his own. Bryson’s corner was met by Keane, whose downward header was brilliantly saved by Gilks, only to fall to Keogh who couldn’t miss for his first of the campaign.

Party time then for the remainder of added time, with some fans clearly having overdosed on the iPros, claiming that the Rams were going up! A long, long way to go but my hot lemon had kicked in enough for me to enjoy it nonetheless.

Full-time and that warm fuzzy feeling that you can’t replicate from your sofa. Yes, the opposition were missing several key players but five goals, especially after trailing at half-time isn’t to be snivelled at.

Well, I tried my best!

Reaction:

We Said — Derby Head Coach Steve McClaren:

"We said at half time its a case of staying in the game and we'll get stronger because we have a fit bunch here. That's basically what we did, we ground Blackpool down, made them make errors and lose concentration and we scored some great goals.”

"We don't want to stop the run, our first job was to try and bring the crowds back and play the kind of football that would encourage that, the players have done that and I've inherited a good squad."

They Said — Blackpool Manager Paul Ince:

"As a whole, we weren't very good, but you can understand that when we've lost two of our main centre-halves. It was hard for them but they tried their best. I don't think you'll ever see any teams in this league ever having a defence that I had today, with players playing in positions they never have before."