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Corny Joke Warning 16:56 - Aug 29 with 855985 viewsBoston

What vehicle do electricians prefer to drive?

A Volts Wagon.

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

3
Corny Joke Warning on 23:11 - Jun 26 with 7154 viewsTrom

I've recently got into playing silent tennis.

It's like normal tennis but without the racket.
3
Corny Joke Warning on 17:55 - Jul 12 with 6672 viewsEsox_Lucius

Have you ever been sat in your car, singing along to the radio, and noticed the person in the car next to you is singing the same song? It happened to me today. I was bombing down the motorway, singing along to the Spice Girls. I looked to my right and a guy was staring at me, singing the same song. You wouldn’t have thought “Stop Right Now” would be a policeman's type of song, but there you go.

The grass is always greener.

-1
Corny Joke Warning on 23:24 - Jul 12 with 6532 viewsBoston

What do you get when you put a car and a pet together?


Carpet.

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

0
Corny Joke Warning on 00:59 - Jul 13 with 6461 viewsBoston

I note the decision in the Alec Baldwin trial... and I stand behind the man.


But you won't catch me standing in front of him.
[Post edited 13 Jul 2024 1:28]

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

2
Corny Joke Warning on 20:52 - Jul 13 with 6232 viewsSonofpugwash

When I was growing up we didn't have the internet.
People had to come all the way to my house to call me a c*nt.

Poll: Dykes - love him or hate him?

1
Corny Joke Warning on 16:32 - Jul 14 with 6045 viewsBoston

Not made up, actually breaking news from New York...

The first female commissioner of the NY Fire Department, Laura Kavanagh, has decided to resign.

When asked why she was stepping down she replied, "it's time to pass on the torch".

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

0
Corny Joke Warning on 08:52 - Jul 16 with 5812 viewsCateLeBonR

I can't decide what type of fish I saw swimming under the bridge today. I'm going to mullet over.
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Corny Joke Warning on 09:07 - Jul 16 with 5793 viewsjohann28

Corny Joke Warning on 08:52 - Jul 16 by CateLeBonR

I can't decide what type of fish I saw swimming under the bridge today. I'm going to mullet over.


I wouldn't bother. Bound to be a red herring
1
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Corny Joke Warning on 20:37 - Jul 16 with 5613 viewsSonofpugwash

Patient; "Doctor, what happens when we die?"
Doctor; "We clean down the bed and bring in a new patient. "

Poll: Dykes - love him or hate him?

1
Corny Joke Warning on 20:39 - Jul 17 with 5392 viewsSonofpugwash

Man goes in yo a library,says to the librarian "have you got a book about men with really small penises?"
She replies "It's not in yet"
"Yeah that's the one".

Poll: Dykes - love him or hate him?

1
Corny Joke Warning on 13:16 - Jul 18 with 5273 views222gers

I was driving up the A12 when I saw a car at the side of the road with his hazards on.
I pulled over to see if there was any assistance I could be of.
He said “I'm out of petrol, could you get me some”
I said “I can't but Jerry can”
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Corny Joke Warning on 15:09 - Jul 19 with 5078 viewsBoston

Myself and Mrs Boston were wed in a toilet.

It was a marriage of convenience.

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

1
Corny Joke Warning on 22:44 - Jul 27 with 4651 viewsloftboy

I've got a bottle of Newcastle Brown stuck in my foot...



The doctor says it's an ingrowing toon ale.

favourite cheese mature Cheddar. FFS there is no such thing as the EPL
Poll: Are you watching the World Cup

5
Corny Joke Warning on 23:09 - Jul 27 with 4599 viewsBoston

Corny Joke Warning on 22:44 - Jul 27 by loftboy

I've got a bottle of Newcastle Brown stuck in my foot...



The doctor says it's an ingrowing toon ale.



Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

5
Corny Joke Warning on 22:32 - Aug 1 with 4256 viewsBoston


Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

0
Corny Joke Warning on 16:34 - Aug 4 with 3933 viewsBoston

Mrs Boston was just telling me that 40 is the new 30.

Lovely women...banned from driving.

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

0
Corny Joke Warning on 00:52 - Aug 8 with 3624 viewsBoston


Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

0
Corny Joke Warning on 01:02 - Aug 8 with 3617 viewsBoston


Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

3
Corny Joke Warning on 17:57 - Aug 16 with 3192 viewsEsox_Lucius

I went to donate blood today, never again! They asked way too many questions: where did the blood come from? Whose blood is it? Why is it in a plastic bucket.
[Post edited 17 Aug 2024 14:11]

The grass is always greener.

4
Corny Joke Warning on 10:33 - Aug 17 with 2862 viewsSonofpugwash

My first parachute jump and I was terrified.
My instructor said "If you don't jump I'll stick two fingers up your arse."
"And did you jump?" asked a friend.
"A little bit" I replied.

Poll: Dykes - love him or hate him?

1
Corny Joke Warning on 11:41 - Aug 17 with 2768 viewsloftboy

I didn’t think Monkey Pox was a real thing,

Then I saw their face, now I’m a believer.

favourite cheese mature Cheddar. FFS there is no such thing as the EPL
Poll: Are you watching the World Cup

2
Corny Joke Warning on 11:05 - Aug 18 with 2564 viewsRebalhoop

Grandad Jim,from Stepney,came to see us yesterday,so we thought we’d take him out for a Curry,I love a good Ruby,says Grandad,anyway,there all are reminiscing about the good old days,when talk turns to Grandads favourite music,when just at that point,the waiter turns to Grandad and asks
“Do you like Channa Dall” Grandad says”Don’t like no Bowie songs son”
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Corny Joke Warning on 14:49 - Aug 18 with 8203 viewsSonofpugwash

Me and my companion were thinking about going on a Scandinavian jaunt by a hired classic car.Maybe a Fjord Escort?

Poll: Dykes - love him or hate him?

3
Corny Joke Warning on 22:53 - Aug 19 with 7932 viewsBoston

They knock those electric buses, but I tell ya they're bloody warm in the winter.

Until the Fire Brigade arrives.

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

0
Corny Joke Warning on 23:08 - Aug 19 with 7916 viewsBoston

Two farm labourers are heading to the pub after work.

Suddenly they hear the roar of a motorcycle and as it passes are shocked to see the rider is headless.

Spooked by this apparition, they double down on their walk to the pub.

A few minutes later, they are startled by the sound of a bicycle bell, doubly so when the bike goes by, for the cyclist is also headless.

They continue walking when Mick turns to Jim and says "I'm thinking it may be a good idea to carry that scythe on your other shoulder".

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

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