QPR left Swansea with a point from a 1-1 draw on Tuesday night in a game they could easily have won or lost in slightly different circumstances.
The attraction of modern day football can be a difficult thing to quantify for the uninitiated at the best of times. If you’re attempting it this holiday season - for an elderly relative perhaps, or friends from abroad – maybe gloss over this match and move onto one a little less ridiculous. The Liberty Stadium on Tuesday night was a place where nothing made sense, where even the most clued up of football aficionados was left shaking their head.
Why, just as a for instance to start with, did the best part of 1,000 people decide to drive the thick end of 400 miles from London to South Wales slap bang on the middle of the Christmas and New Year break to watch their team that had won only one of its previous eight games take part in a match that was televised live and available to watch for the price of a pint in their local pub?
How, as a follow up question, did that team ultimately take a point from a game against the smallest (physically) team in the league despite - over the course of 11 ball acheing corners, countless attacking free kicks and an unprecedented two foul throws – delivering an object lesson is how to take dreadful set pieces?
For the first half at least QPR weren’t much better in open play either, frequently casting the ball aside like some tart from the office rather than treasuring it like a life-long lover. Possession though, isn’t everything. If it was, Swansea would be battling with the two Manchester clubs and Spurs at the top end of the Premier Division that they joined with QPR earlier this year.
Good God Swansea like possession, but at times the experience of watching them play is similar to one you might have on a visit to the Tate Modern. “Marvellous darling, simply wonderful” people cry as they gaze upon this supposed art form – quite often though, Swansea are the footballing equivalent of an abstract painting of a hairy minge. Pointless, pretentious, dull.
Side to side the ball goes, repeatedly left and right, and backwards - very frequently backwards. Pundits count the passes for you; “21, 22, 23”. Fluidly, calmly, methodically they go about their work, like a footballing metronome. Aren’t they majestic darling? But, like a metronome, they rarely go anywhere. Tick tock, left to right, pass, pass, pass, tick, tock. Swansea are fourteenth, without a single win away from home, and with only 17 goals scored in 18 matches.
QPR, meanwhile, look like a bored teenager on Boxing Day; grumpy and not entirely sure what to do with themselves. They no longer seem to know their best formation, system, shape or starting 11. They go from not even being able to take a throw in to looking like the only winners of a difficult away game and back again. They go from not being able to pass a ball five feet to stringing three minute long moves of their own together. They can spend an hour looking more capable of a moon landing in the team bus than scoring a goal and then get two in four minutes and then still lose anyway.
Neil Warnock’s team selection, formation and personnel wise, is increasingly erratic. Here he dropped both his centre halves after Wednesday’s Sunderland abomination and picked ageing left back Clint Hill in the centre with the club’s resident bulimic Fitz Hall. Armand Traore played left back, Luke Young right and Paddy Kenny in goal. Further forward a three man midfield of Joey Barton, Shaun Derry and Alejandro Faurlin morphed into a two man set up with Barton wideright. An initial front three of Jamie Mackie, Hiedar Helguson and Adel Taaabt, starting for the first time since early October, transformed into a lone striker with three man supporting cast after half time.
Given the contrast in the team and individual performances before and after half time it’s not hard to see why Warnock is having such difficult pinning down a successful formula. This team could win 2-0 at Arsenal on Saturday or concede eight, that’s just how they are; random, nonsensical, inconsistent, infuriating and without logic.
Speaking of which the referee for this fixture was Lee Probert, a man who gave the impression he’d rather overindulged in the Christmas sherry, or been plucked from the Boxing Day sales as a late replacement for somebody who had actually seen a game of football before.
Swansea started with Wayne Routledge wide on the right of their attack. Twice a QPR player, Routledge would surely have been so again this summer had Flavio Briatore not refused to spend even the most meagre sums while he awaited takeover offers. Routledge hasn’t scored a Premiership goal in his career which currently spans 112 top flight appearances with eight different clubs. QPR are usually ideal fodder for such occasions but although he made an early impact here, crossing low from the right in the ninth minute, the crucial blow was struck by a combination of lone striker Danny Graham, who could also have been a QPR player this summer had Flavio Briatore etc etc, and referee Probert.
Routledge’s cross was slightly behind Graham as he entered the penalty area, and travelling at a fair lick, so the former Watford man reached out and controlled the ball with his hand before turning and curling a fine finish around Hall and into the bottom corner past the despairing dive of Kenny. All, except those who had been in the toilet or reading their programme at the time, wore perplexed expressions. Probert explained to QPR later that, yes, Graham had indeed handled the ball and, yes, he had seen him do it from a distance of roughly 15 yards away but that, in his opinion, the act of controlling an uncontrollable cross and bringing it down perfectly for the finish with the palm of his hand was not deliberate as defined by the rules of the game. The goal stood.
Like I say, if you’re trying to explain football to a novice this Christmas, scratch this match from your list of visual aids.
QPR had enjoyed the better of lively opening exchanges prior to that. Heidar Helguson almost found himself running through on goal in their first attack but Faurlin’s measured ball through to him clipped his heals and bounced to safety, then the Icelandic target man headed a deep cross from Barton down at the back post and Mackie worried the Swans’ in form goalkeeper Michel Vorm in the six yard box but the Dutchman gathered at the second attempt. At the other end Graham was inches away from connecting with Wayne Routledge’s well flighted cross at the near post.
But the R’s are revelling in making life difficult for themselves at the moment and having conceded they gave the ball away within two touches from their own kick off and immediately had to defend a corner which centre half Ashley Williams headed wide. They then allowed Scott Sinclair to run from halfway to the byline and cut a ball back that Graham was beaten to at the near post by Hill. Credit where credit is due though this, and another slaloming venture forward in the second half, was all we saw of Sinclair who was outstanding in the Swans’ promotion campaign last term but well marshalled here by Luke Young.
QPR’s outstanding player last season, and in this game, was Adel Taarabt. Here he turned in his best performance of the season, marrying the tricks and flicks that make him such a handful with an economical use of the ball often missing from his game. At the midway point of the half, shortly after the Graham chance, he milked a free kick from Agustien and quickly set up Barton for a long range shot that Vorm turned over the bar with what could kindly be described as a camera save.
That produced one of 11, mostly dreadful, QPR corners. Faurlin had a crack with this one although he quickly handed the job to Adel Taarabt (the lack of a designated taker hints at poor preparation) and he went deep where Hall was able to nod the ball down and Barton saw a volley blocked in the six yard area. Swansea, a team so lacking in height they were forced to constantly work set pieces short in a recent game against Alex Mcleish’s physical Aston Villa side, did threaten from a wide set piece for a second time in quick succession when Williams planted Allen’s delivery wide after being given too much time. QPR’s defence of these situations is almost as bad as their execution of them at the moment – again one has to question the preparation.
Not only did they struggle with corners and free kicks, QPR couldn’t even take their throw ins properly. Barton was penalised for a laughably bad effort during a period of the first half where he literally couldn’t do a thing right and then after half time Armand Traore repeated the trick leading to his manager picking up a ball and giving a demonstration of the technique. When they did produce a legal one, ten minutes before half time, they lost the ball within one touch and Paddy Kenny was quickly forced into a save by Danny Graham. The former Middlesbrough man had earlier found the side netting with a low shot that came after he’d been flagged offside, as did a later lob from Wayne Routledge that landed on the roof of the net. The defensive line was good on those occasions, and the makeshift partnership between Hill and Hall performed well overall albeit against one of the division’s statistically weakest attacks that would be further hampered by a poor choice of substitution in the second half.
The sides exchanged yellow cards before the break – Hill cautioned for a tactical foul on Angel Rangel as he counter attacked that left the Spaniard nursing an injury that would later force him off and young full back Ashley Richards for chopping down Joey Barton. Those two would clash again later.
As time wound down another poor corner was worked back to Taarabt who fed Young and his cross was headed over by Hill who was unmarked. Then Barton, finally improving after two and a half games of dross, delivered a fine cross that Helguson headed over when you would perhaps have expected him to score.
Half time bollocking handed out, QPR re-emerged for the second period with renewed purpose. Traore put in a testing early cross before Taarabt volleyed wide of the target via the aid of a deflection. Swansea, predictably, cleared the subsequent corner when a better delivery could have picked out Fitz Hall unattended at the back stick.
At the far end of the ground typically patient build up from the home side culminated with Allen laying Routledge in behind the last man but his cross shot flew all the way through the six yard box with Graham unable to arrive in time to apply a finishing touch.
Then, in the space of 60 seconds on the hour, the whole shape, pattern and direction of the game completely changed. First Swansea’s tidy Spanish full back Angel Rangel surrendered in his battle to continue through the pain barrier. His manager Brendan Rodgers responded by removing him and sending on striker Luke Moore. The effect of this was twofold: firstly it meant Kemiy Agustien, Swansea’s best midfield player to this point, was forced to move to right full back where he wasn’t nearly as effective; and secondly it immediately reduced Swansea to ten men because, as we know from our own miserable experiences with his brother Stefan, the Moore family is to football what Little Mix are to the music industry. Moore stayed true to previous form and was insipid, ineffective and almost completely useless in his half hour on the pitch. His arrival, along with the departure of Wayne Routledge who was replaced by Nathan Dyer, meant QPR were able to take the match over completely and they equalised straight from the restart.
A long kick downfield by Paddy Kenny was inadvertently flicked back into his own area by Leon Britton as he lost his balance and Jamie Mackie didn’t need asking twice to run in behind, control the ball and then slip it between Vorm’s legs and in for the equaliser.
Neil Warnock didn’t make a substitution in this game – he didn’t need to, Rodgers had done QPR’s game changing for them. With Leroy Lita and Stephen Dobbie to call on from the bench it’s hard to see the logic in introducing Moore. Rodgers would have done a better job up front himself. The giant Swan mascot wandering around the side of the pitch would have done a better job.
Then, the refereeing took a turn for the eccentric. First Fitz Hall was allowed to climb right over the back of Graham to win a header that subsequently developed into a chance for Mackie who skipped between two players in the penalty area but found Vorm had read his intentions and smothered the danger. Referee Probert wasn’t quite so alert, caught stationary and thinking about other things on the halfway line by Barton who was inadvertently tackled by the official which in turn allowed Swansea to attack and force a corner. Luckily Probert’s assist only fell to Moore rather than an actual footballer.
In between those incidents the home crowd had bayed for Barton’s blood after full back Richards had cleared a ball down the line and kicked through onto Barton’s outstretched block attempt. The Swansea man hit the deck immediately, writhing in apparent agony as the Swansea fans, to a man, stood and demanded immediate, harsh sanctions against the QPR man. A yellow card was produced, to the home fans’ disgust, and Richards them immediately made a complete and full recovery, leaping to his feet and bounding off down the field without the need for attention from the physio, stopping only to refuse Barton’s hand of apology. And we’re told the QPR man is the pantomime villain.
There was brief respite from the farce when Taarabt had a shot blocked on the edge of the area, and then skilfully turned his man and attempted to seek out the far corner in the same manner as Graham had in the first half but Vorm produced a fantastic finger tip save to deny him.
In between those two shots though, more from Probert. QPR’s Senegalese full back Armand Traore, not for the first time in the game it must be said, took an unnecessary extra touch on the ball in a dangerous area. On this occasion Danny Graham had gambled on him doing just that and raced to the scene to cleanly take the ball off his toe as he went to clear it down field. Traore executed the clearance anyway, hacking into the back of Graham’s leg and sending him sprawling in the penalty area. A blatant spot kick, a dictionary definition of a penalty, but once again Probert gave the impression of a man caught thinking about other things – he neither awarded the kick, nor waved play on. He just sort of stood there, stupefied.
Two minutes later Williams strode calmly out of the Swansea defence and executed a body slam on Adel Taarabt as he attacked down the left flank. Again a blatant foul, again Probert awarded nothing. We were one more piece of incompetence away from the police vacating the ground and declaring mob rule at this stage. Anything went. I’d suggest that Probert had borrowed the Stuart Attwell random generator of maddening refereeing decisions for the afternoon had Attwell not been making prolific use of it himself back in London at Arsenal v Wolves. For the second time in a week I’m struggling for words to describe a match official. Never mind a demotion, a long spell in the padded room is required for this chump.
With 13 minutes to go a football match broke out again. QPR strung an attractive move together down their left flank culminating in a cross from Traore that sailed through the six yard box to Joey Barton who should have put his boot through a presentable chance at the back post but instead searched for a team mate and lost the initiative. From the resulting corner Hall headed onto the roof of the net.
Swansea returned fire, Scott Sinclair posing a rare threat by jinking his way past three men and winning a free kick on the corner of the box that he took himself and Rangers were lucky to escape as Paddy Kenny’s unorthodox save at the far post sent the ball bouncing safely to a man wearing baby-sick orange rather than a home player.
Thereafter QPR rather settled for a point, which was disappointing considering their second half dominance and the ease at which they were getting dangerous possession around the Swansea penalty area. I wondered about Jay Bothroyd or Shaun Wright-Phillips coming on to try and assert the advantage but Warnock, and his team, seemed happy with their point. So much so that they adopted Swansea’s metronome technique – brutally murdering the final ten minutes of the game by moving the ball from one side to the other and back again.
Probert was talked into booking Adel Taarabt by Ashley Williams for kicking the ball away in three minutes of added time – I say ‘talked into’ because Probert was actually looking the other way when the Moroccan did it and showed no inclination towards booking the QPR man until Williams delivered a volley of advice to him.
And that was that. For QPR a point well won but a nagging doubt that more ambition from players and manager could have brought a vital two more in the final ten minutes of the game. Moving forward the key, even before the anticipated January transfer window arrivals, must be to achieve a consistent team selection and level of performance – the gap between QPR’s best and worst football is vast and can often be seen within ten minutes of a match. The amount of simple things they’re doing wrong – ten yard passes, corners, free kicks, throw ins –should shame them into extra training. The way they’ve fought back twice this week against Swansea and Sunderland should reassure everybody that the spirit remains intact.
For Swansea, more penetration required. You don’t score goals from the halfway line, no matter how many passes you put together there, and you don’t win points for completing 30 passes and not actually going anywhere. It’s admirable stuff, but not particularly effective. Almost all their points have come at home so far, but Man City, Liverpool, Chelsea, Spurs, Arsenal and others all still have to come here.
For Lee Probert, a long holiday. Preferably with one of those travel companies that goes into liquidation shortly after you land at Arse End of Nowhere International Airport.
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Swansea: Vorm 7, Rangel 7 (Moore 57, 4), Williams 7, Caulker 6, Richards 6, Sinclair 6, Britton 6, Agustien 7, Allen 6, Routledge 7 (Dyer 56, 6), Graham 7
Subs Not Used: Tremmel, Dobbie, Monk, Lita, Gower
Booked: Richards (foul)
Goals: Graham 14 (assisted Routledge)
QPR: Kenny 6, Young 7, Hill 7, Hall 7, Traore 6, Mackie 7, Barton 6, Derry 6, Faurlin 7, Taarabt 7, Helguson 6
Subs Not Used: Cerny, Orr, Gabbidon, Bothroyd, Connolly, Smith, Wright-Phillips
Booked: Hill (foul), Barton (foul), Taarabt (kicking ball away)
Goals: Mackie 58 (assisted Kenny)
QPR Star Man – Adel Taarabt 7 Played in the right areas, didn’t give the ball away as much as he can do, and posed a threat to Swansea rather than his own team as has often been the case this season. Taarabt playing like this has to be in the team, we were so much better to look at and more dangerous in possession with him in the team than we have been recently without him. The problem is that he, like the team as a whole, could go from a good performance here to a dreadful one at Arsenal on Saturday. It’s his inconsistency and attitude that keeps Taarabt at QPR and, I believe, will do so again this January.
Referee: Lee Probert (Wiltshire) 3 For all the dodgy calls, bizarre decisions and tackles executed on QPR players in the centre of the field it’s the big decisions in games that referees should be judged on. Probert had two big calls to make in this match and got both of them wrong. He cannot say he was unsighted, or that the decisions were borderline, because they were clear as day, right in front of him and absolutely blatant. Swansea’s first goal should have been disallowed for handball, and they should have had a penalty in the second half. When you then marry that up with the other irritations you find yourself with a refereeing performance far, far beneath what should be expected of a referee in the Premier League.
Attendance: 19, 530 (900 QPR approx) It’s often difficult to generate atmosphere in a new stadium but Swansea have an enthusiastic home crowd and, as they didn’t make the Coventry mistake of building a ground three times bigger than they needed, they’re all tightly packed in on three sides. The result was a really fantastic atmosphere that lasted for the entire game, even immediately after the QPR equaliser. Compare the constant din and screaming appeals for every decision from the Swansea faithful to the library-like state of the famous Kop End when we visited the other week and it’s chalk and cheese. QPR deserve credit too, we brought more than twice as many fans to this game as I thought we would given the location, kick off time, Sky coverage and recent form. Excellent all round, as it always seems to be when we come here.
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Pictures – Action Images