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Petty Insanities 16:04 - May 16 with 12083 views

and examples of unreasonable behavior.

Not throwing hot teabags in the bin lest you burn the house down, turning the car radio off when looking for a new address.

That sort of thing.

Petty Insanities on 16:06 - May 17 with 1747 views

SheffieldHoop

Petty Insanities on 18:43 - May 16 by Gus_iom
Is the chicken wandering around doing its thing when your wife grabs it and gives it a good clean, or is it packaged for consumption? I think we should be told.

That depends on which country we're in!

I'm banned from the left side of our cooker as it gets splashes on her cake stand thing.....So usually back right as it's the bigger one. Instinctively I want to use Front Left, but just not worth the agg.

Another is how often we coat our kids with coconut oil.....She reckons it needs doing after every bath, whereas I always thought coconut oil was for cooking.

"Someone despises me. That's their problem." Marcus Aurelius

Petty Insanities on 16:12 - May 17 with 1732 views

kensalriser

I can't look at the scoreboard clock until the ball goes out of play. Easily rationalised by claiming it reduces obsessive clock watching when the game is tight (which is most of the time) but really it's more of a superstition.

Poll:

QPR to finish 7th or Brentford to drop out of the top 6?

Petty Insanities on 17:16 - May 17 with 1680 views

numptydumpty

Petty Insanities on 07:46 - May 17 by Spaceman_P
this is just how relationships naturally go right?

It's very common women will say they are fine to their partner when they are clearly not and the follow up question so what's wrong is answered by nothing when you know it's something.

I then saw you say you are autistic so I understand why you may ask if it's normal

Ie you take on whatever is said as being the case and find normal social cues or strangeness in conversation as logical.

I worked for many years in a home supporting people who experiemced severe autism and actually have couple friends who have mild asperges.

So understand how your question is asked.

Must be a challenge for you to read all the nonsense we all post on here.

Good luck to you Spaceman

Hope all is good with you...

	Walking in a "Mackie Wonderland"
Poll:	Where will we finish next season ???

Petty Insanities on 17:25 - May 17 with 1669 views

Northernr

People who go one stop on the bus. Sometimes standing and waiting ten minutes for one to arrive to do so. It's over there, I can literally see it.

Petty Insanities on 18:48 - May 17 with 1595 views

numptydumpty

Petty Insanities on 17:25 - May 17 by Northernr
People who go one stop on the bus. Sometimes standing and waiting ten minutes for one to arrive to do so. It's over there, I can literally see it.

Rarely use busses

Do the occasional chelsea fan greet you with the classic inbetweeners greeting

Always feel compelled to do such but my moral conscience gets the better of me !!

	Walking in a "Mackie Wonderland"
Poll:	Where will we finish next season ???

Petty Insanities on 19:07 - May 17 with 1576 views

welwynranger

Golfers who all the way round
State the bleeding obvious.
EG......
I shouldnt have hit that so far (left or right )then i wouldnt be in the trees.

I wish i had hit that putt ( harder or not as hard) it would have dropped.

Not a word about a bad shot it boils my p**s

Petty Insanities on 19:28 - May 17 with 1550 views

Hayesender

I check the front door is locked before i go to bed, knowing full well it's locked. I then take the keys out and put them in the place in the living room where they always go, before checking the door is locked again, just in case I unlocked it checking if it was locked in the first place.

I can then relax and go to bed

Poll:

Shamima Beghum

Petty Insanities on 19:31 - May 17 with 1547 views

Hayesender

Petty Insanities on 19:24 - May 16 by qprxtc
I always fall fast asleep directly after intercourse.

I once fell asleep during intercourse. True story

Poll:

Shamima Beghum

Petty Insanities on 19:40 - May 17 with 1539 views

ChrisNW6

Petty Insanities on 01:33 - May 17 by Jules4367

Coming up to driver in middle lane of motorway, nothing in left lane, flashing headlights before I get there, beeping as I go by, then pointing left suggesting pull over as I carry on down the road in the left lane ........ and still believing, EVERY TIME that the simple, mindless or arrogant driver (still poodling along in the middle lane of my rear view mirror) actually understands or even cares about THEIR part in what just happened!

Every time...I never learn and I drive myself mad with it= why are there so many thick, ignorant or arrogant people on the road these days?

Thinking of crossing the roof of my car with a Chieftan tank turret, so I can blast these plonkers out of the way!

IF you are someone who drives in the middle lane, when there is nothing in the left lane watch out for the Ford C max with a large barrel on top coming up behnd you

I am driver, that drives on the inside lane approaching a middle lane hogger doing half my speed and does the two lane move to the right to overtake, then performs the two lane move back to the inside lane.

I am guessing the middle lane hogger tuts and says 'look at that lunatic'

I have seen the road signs flash up with messages telling people to not hog the middle lane but I am sure these drivers are still totally oblivious 🤯

Petty Insanities on 20:17 - May 17 with 1513 views

Superhoops2808

So to confirm:

Toilet Roll has to be front loading - Missus doesn't care and she ALWAYS leaves the empty roll behind

Towel chucked on the rail not folded drives me nuts too

People driving with their fog lights on

Middle Lane hogs - I just cruise past in the left lane shaking my head. Not wasting my petrol on driving the long way round them

People who refuse to merge in turn as a lane closes

I never look at the league table till after the final whistle - Brings bad luck for me

And sorry Norf... I get on the bus for two stops because I am f**ked if I am walking up the hill (Plus its free anyway!!)

Petty Insanities on 20:53 - May 17 with 1489 views

QPRSteve

Petty Insanities on 17:25 - May 17 by Northernr
People who go one stop on the bus. Sometimes standing and waiting ten minutes for one to arrive to do so. It's over there, I can literally see it.

Had a mate who worked foe LT who would do that. Still would not have gotten a round in by the time the rest of us got to the pub. Tight git.

Petty Insanities on 21:26 - May 17 with 1459 views

hantssi

Petty Insanities on 19:07 - May 17 by welwynranger
Golfers who all the way round State the bleeding obvious. EG...... I shouldnt have hit that so far (left or right )then i wouldnt be in the trees. I wish i had hit that putt ( harder or not as hard) it would have dropped. Not a word about a bad shot it boils my p**s

That sounds like my golf!
I’d be a scratch golfer if I hit every shot perfectly!
And, definitely a front toilet paper hanger too!

Petty Insanities on 22:11 - May 17 with 1406 views

SimonJames

Petty Insanities on 19:31 - May 17 by Hayesender
I once fell asleep during intercourse. True story

Back in the 80's, in my yoof, I woke up several times naked in bedrooms I didn't recognise, with women I didn't know. And if they were asleep I usually sneaked out, not knowing what the hell had happened.

100% of people who drink water will die.

Petty Insanities on 22:16 - May 17 with 1394 views

ted_hendrix

The knob driving along In the middle lane of any motorway In the UK will invariably be a Blue or White 1978 Volvo estate driver.

He'll be about 47 years old sticking religiously to driving at 63 MPH and he'll be wearing a nice cardigan with leather elbows and he'll be smoking a pipe with a pleasant smile on his goatee bearded f ucking face whilst his stupid wife sits next to him seat belt on but stone cold dead having died of boredom whilst on a tour of teapot factories In the village of Bilbrook, Staffordshire.

Feel free to undertake above mentioned minge and feel free to pop your window as you undertake above mentioned minge and hurl abuse at him, he'll just smile and wave at you.

My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.

Petty Insanities on 22:21 - May 17 with 1383 views

QuillPenRiot

Petty Insanities on 14:40 - May 17 by CLAREMAN1995

Drove by a hearse at the head of a funeral convoy yesterday (they were in the slow lane I was in the middle lane )and made the sign of the cross just by instinct .
My youngest daughter asked me why I did that and I just said its something I have done since I was a boy and do it almost subconciously now.
Maybe a mark of respect or prayer for the deceased I am not sure .
p.s My 85 year old Mother In Law just shuffled by and she said she always blessed herself passing a graveyard her whole life as well as the hearse so it might be an Irish Catholic thing we suspect

I have to admit I don’t believe in hell. I once hired an Irishman who was an evangelist Christian. I didn’t know they existed and I’m all about diversity. I liked him, and then there was a social event where everyone was eating ice cream. I said to him, “Matty, am I going to hell?”, and I’m his boss you know, and he replies, “Of course you are, I’m sorry.” I told him now worries that I didn’t believe in in, smiled and gave him a pat on the back. And he said “Well I do! It’s frightening!” We finished our ice creams and went back to work.

Petty Insanities on 00:49 - May 18 with 1289 views

Loftgirl

Petty Insanities on 17:25 - May 17 by Northernr
People who go one stop on the bus. Sometimes standing and waiting ten minutes for one to arrive to do so. It's over there, I can literally see it.

As a bus driver here in Brisbane, I regularly had a large lady get on outside a train station, ride all the way to the terminus, stay on the bus for the return journey, only to get off opposite the station she got on at. A good 40 minutes just to cross the road.

Petty Insanities on 07:06 - May 18 with 1188 views

Bluce_Ree

If I'm in a place and there is an animal toy thing or teddy bear or some sort of shit like that, if it's facing the wall or is face down, I have to move it so 'it can see.'

Stefan Moore, Stefan Moore running down the wing. Stefan Moore, Stefan Moore running down the wing. He runs like a cheetah, his crosses couldn't be sweeter. Stefan Moore. Stefan Moore. Stefan Moore.

Petty Insanities on 07:41 - May 18 with 1132 views

BklynRanger

I've had a slight obsession with the number 18 since my early teens. No idea why. It's mostly expressed by doing this fidget with my fingers or toes that adds up to 18. Then Ale Faurlin showed up playing for us with the number 18 on his back and it all suddenly made sense. I think.

Petty Insanities on 08:28 - May 18 with 1092 views

nix

Petty Insanities on 07:06 - May 17 by Bluce_Ree
Might be. Mrs Bluce tried that backwards hanging bullshit and I was 5 mins from getting a lawyer involved.

Nope. Other way round in our house. Drives me bonkers. Logical to have it front-loading in my view.

Also leaving the loo seat up. Just plain rude: if you accidentally sit on the porcelain in the middle of the night it's not pleasant!

Buying those socks in packets where each pair is slightly different style/colour so it takes decades to pair them.

Cramming the bin extra full so they don't have to empty it themselves and makes it extra hard to remove and leaves mess on the lid so you have to clean that too.

Standing in front of the fridge when someone is cooking and staying there even after you've had to move them twice.

Leaving keys, bag, tie and other detritus on the kitchen island - particularly shopping that remains there for weeks (until I clear it up having lost the will to live).

I also hate middle lane hoggers. Having said that I can't stand people who come right up behind you aggressively in the fast lane when there's no space in the middle lane for you to safely move across (having gone in the fast lane to pass the lane hogger and someone in front has taken the space you were going into in the middle lane).

Life is very stressful for me, seemingly.

Petty Insanities on 08:40 - May 18 with 1075 views

Superhoops2808

Oh yeah, forgot one other thing

Everything in the cupboards have to be facing the same way. Beans etc all have to be exactly lined up

Petty Insanities on 08:43 - May 18 with 1070 views

paulparker

Petty Insanities on 01:33 - May 17 by Jules4367

You must follow me on the M1 every day between 14/15 , the worse thing they did was build a 4th lane as every miss daisy is plodding along doing 40 in the middle , I’ve now become one of those people who weave in and out of lanes

And Bowles is onside, Swinburne has come rushing out of his goal , what can Bowles do here , onto the left foot no, on to the right foot That’s there that’s two, and that’s Bowles Brian Moore

Petty Insanities on 09:31 - May 18 with 1029 views

numptydumpty

Petty Insanities on 08:43 - May 18 by paulparker
You must follow me on the M1 every day between 14/15 , the worse thing they did was build a 4th lane as every miss daisy is plodding along doing 40 in the middle , I’ve now become one of those people who weave in and out of lanes

Smart motorways

So a motorway with no hard shoulder - crazy idea !!!

If you breakdown, you could potentially be in serious danger..

Whoever had this idea, go straight to the bottom of the class - what is safe about it - more accidents - not less !!!

	Walking in a "Mackie Wonderland"
Poll:	Where will we finish next season ???

Petty Insanities on 13:34 - May 18 with 926 views

Metallica_Hoop

Petty Insanities on 14:00 - May 17 by Benny_the_Ball
Performing the sign of the cross whenever a hearse with a coffin drives past. It's something I inherited from my (Catholic) parents, and was passed through the generations. The entire family does it, instinctively. We've spoken about it, we have no idea why we do it, but we continue to do so.

In the winter a hearse drove past with mourners behind so I took off my Iron Maiden Beanie as it went past, no idea why I did.

Locking the bike, knowing I've locked the bike getting 10 yards up the road and going back to make sure I locked it.

Beer and Beef has made us what we are - The Prince Regent

Petty Insanities on 14:04 - May 18 with 893 views

Benny_the_Ball

Petty Insanities on 14:40 - May 17 by CLAREMAN1995

Some of my relatives would also bless themselves when passing a graveyard where a relative was buried. All would instinctively do so when passing a hearse.
P.S. As I don't have Irish blood in my family it's probably a Catholic thing.

Petty Insanities on 14:18 - May 18 with 874 views

Benny_the_Ball

Petty Insanities on 19:07 - May 17 by welwynranger
Golfers who all the way round State the bleeding obvious. EG...... I shouldnt have hit that so far (left or right )then i wouldnt be in the trees. I wish i had hit that putt ( harder or not as hard) it would have dropped. Not a word about a bad shot it boils my p**s

I suspect that comes from trying to maintain a positive mindset so you don't affect the next shot. Personally, I find it delusional; it does nothing to improve your game.

My golfing petty insanity is players who award themselves gimmes. I once played a round with a chap who awarded himself a gimme for any putt within 12 feet. At the end of the round he exclaimed "I just realised I shot a 72", to which I replied "That's assuming you would have made all 18 putts. Had you 2 putted them all, you'd have shot 90".

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