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Celar's deepening nightmare leaves QPR well adrift – Report

There were certainly improvements from QPR in Saturday’s home draw with Stoke, but their goalscoring woes deepened with a Zan Celar penalty miss, and only Paul Nardi’s heroics prevented another defeat.

We start, as I’m afraid we must, with the first half penalty miss.

Paul Smyth burst into the Loft End penalty area and Eric-Junior Bocat, probably suffering some degree of shock that Smyth hadn’t immediately booted the ball into the stand behind the goal, hauled him down for an obvious spot kick. Zan Celar, still desperately searching for a first QPR goal in this his 19th appearance for the club, took hold of the ball and the responsibility. The Slovenia striker checked his run up to try and sell goalkeeper Viktor Johansson a direction, and the Swedish stopper duly bought it and flopped over to his right. The goalkeeper had, weirdly, begun off centre anyway, so his left corner started off vacant and only got more unattended from there. All Celar had to do was roll it in there. Just tap it in. Give it a little taperoo. He missed by a good foot, and we played the goal music anyway, because that’s where he, and we, are at the moment. Cursed striker, cursed club, cursed season.

Celar had previously scored a penalty in the League Cup shoot out against Luton, and the manager insists he is one of three penalty takers on the pitch, but the last spot kick Rangers got in open play was taken by Nicolas Madsen against Hull and parked very firmly in the most unsavable bit of the top corner. Madsen is at the club, primarily, because he scored 16 goals in a poor Westerlo team in the Belgian league over the last two and a bit seasons, but ten of those were spot kicks so it’s not unfair to say the only reason he’s at QPR at all is because he can take penalties. He’s apparently successfully converted his last 13 from the spot. It seemed unfathomable to me that he wasn’t taking this one.

If you wanted to build a positive narrative around a 1-1 home draw with Stoke, now nine games at Loftus Road without a victory to start the season for QPR as that club record extends, then this was it. An improved performance. Defeat avoided. Just not your day. Rangers had 23 shots to Stoke’s nine, hit five on target and had a further seven blocked. They chucked everything they had at it and came up blank. Barrel of tits, thumb. One of those games.

For the third home game this season, Rangers found themselves facing a fairly inspired opposition goalkeeper. Viktor Johansson has been the best gloveman in the Championship for years and it remains something of a mystery to me how Stoke were able to pick him up quite as quickly, easily and cheaply as they did last summer amidst seemingly not much competition. His save of Koki Saito’s first half shot through a crowd was terrific. There was soon a more routine stop of a free Madsen header at the back stick. He was alert at his near post to start the second half when Sam Field turned Saito’s creative approach work towards goal. There was a prolonged scramble and series of shots ten minutes from time which the Swede parried, punched and repelled all while diving over, around and through Tom Cannon who lay injured in the six yard box throughout. Johansson was booked for dissent afterwards, this one of several moments of refereeing which strongly favoured the hosts and left the away end in outright revolt by the end.

Smyth stuck two presentable chances over the bar in the first half, then when he did get a knee over the ball and keep it low in the second his goalbound shot struck a teammate in the crowd scene and rebounded to safety. Saito’s persistent torment of Ben Wilmot produced a shot to the near post, blocked on the line by a defender. Harrison Ashby cut in from that same side and saw a shot of his own deflect past Johansson but off the post. Jimmy Dunne missed a completely free header from a Lucas Andersen corner, and when the Dane broke in the last seconds of normal time and laid in an overhit pass for fellow sub Alfie Lloyd he was able to squirm one past the goalkeeper but only back into play off the opposite upright.

So, Rangers in many ways desperately unlucky not to win the game, as they had been in similar circumstances here against Plymouth and Hull. Just a more favourable bounce of the ball, a slightly different trajectory on a shot, one fewer save… fine margins, as a grown up used to say a lot in these parts.

Plymouth and Hull, though, are not good sides – the former now 19th, with just one away point all season, and the latter now joining Rangers in the relegation zone third from bottom. The R’s have played four of the bottom eight sides at home, and both the other teams in the drop zone, and beaten none of them. Eight of the top ten sides are still to come to Loftus Road.

Stoke looked distinctly mediocre to me. They had the game’s two outstanding players in Johansson and hairy Love Islander Tom Cannon up top, but they were at opposite ends of the field and what existed in between was a lot of stodge. Wouter Burger, their best midfield player, was out suspended and it showed. They’d won 2-0 at Blackburn in their last away game but prior to that gone five without a win, losing four, and scored only three goals on their travels all season – only Plymouth have fewer. And yet Rangers not only didn’t win but were perhaps fortunate to even draw the game. The luck certainly ran both ways in this scatty afternoon of Championship nonsense, played in a howling gale and driving rain.

Stoke took a first half lead when Jimmy Dunne’s cratering recent form continued with him passing the ball straight to Bocat, winning it back, then giving it back to Bocat a second time, and then trying to rescue that situation with a daft foul that took them both out of the game and allowed Cannon to waltz into the acres of space created and finish with real panache over Paul Nardi and into the far corner. Four goals in five games for Cannon now who was quite clearly the best outfield player on this pitch by a thousand, million miles. Dunne gave Smyth a spray – which felt like a stretch. I’d have been having a word or two in return.

It had to be a good goal to beat Nardi on Saturday. It’s never a good sign when the team bottom of the league, with its worst defensive record at home, has its goalkeeper as clear player of the season so far, but that’s where QPR are. Nardi matched Johansson save for save. Often unorthodox and instinctive, bouncing the ball away off chest or boot, but vital stops from sound positioning in horrendous conditions for goalkeeping. That Nardi and Johansson were able to play like this, in this weather, was credit to both.

In the first half he improvised a punched clearance at the back post when a queue of unmarked Stoke players honed in on an inswinging cross. Nardi denied Koumas and Cannon one after the other right at the start of the second half, and made a crucial block in injury time when Harrison Ashby had to concede a cynical foul right on the edge of the box, Cannon’s free kick beat the wall and skidded up off the turf. By far the best save of the afternoon, however, was when Cannon got free on the opposite side of the penalty area and unloaded a seemingly unstoppable shot towards the other corner of the goal – Nardi somehow getting enough on it for the ball to strike the post. A save which even Cannon himself made a point of congratulating the French keeper for – what a nice boy.

Stoke have a similar history with Gavin the Goblin Referee as we do. The Potters were already aggrieved over several decisions – Jimmy Dunne somehow not booked for several fouls, Nicolas Madsen a very obvious yellow card challenge on half time ignored, the incident where QPR were allowed to pepper the goal while Cannon lay injured under the goalkeeper’s feet - when Ward disallowed what looked like a spectacular late winner from Jun-Ho for a handball in the build up. Anger and injustice exacerbated by the length of time it took to give the decision – Jun-Ho had been allowed to move the ball out of his feet, set himself, create space, and find the corner from 25 yards before the whistle.

Two LFW firsts here – solidarity with Stoke, and sympathy with Gavin Ward. To travel all the way down to London on our railways, at that expense, in these conditions, to have a spectacular last minute winning goal taken off you for something like this is fucking grim. I thought it looked a harsh decision and would have been absolutely stewing had it gone against us. The travelling faithful made their feelings very plain through stoppage time and at full time, and we’d have been doing exactly the same. In Ward’s defence, however, this is one of those situations where the sport has taken something relatively simple – you’re not allowed to deliberately handle the football to gain advantage – and made it ridiculously, needlessly complicated to the point players and fans don’t understand the rule, and referees are hung out to dry and made to look silly applying it. As I understand it, you can essentially gain an advantage with an accidental handball, unless you score from it. Had Jun-Ho passed it off to a team mate, and scored a bit later on in the move, instead of blasting it in the net straight away, I believe that would have been fine. So, Ward had to wait, and was right to disallow it. This is though, let’s be honest here, complete fucking bollocks. Who has come up with that? Same meathead who has said you can do what you like to each other in the penalty area, as long as it’s mutual, and the referee has a word with you before the set piece is taken. Fucking nonsense. Modern football is crap #1,378 in the series.

QPR grateful for small mercies, though another home game burned off against beatable opposition for the return of only a single point does next to nothing for their predicament at the bottom. Now five points adrift of Cardiff, that will grow to eight if and when Rangers lose in South Wales on Wednesday night.

The goal they did score rather summed it up. Nicolas Madsen, our 6ft 4ins corner taker, spaffed one dead ball straight at the Stoke man on the near post. When the ball was returned to him, he did exactly the same thing again, and hit the same opponent. This, and Zan Celar capping another abject showing by getting caught lazily walking back from an offside position, seemed to tip Marti Cifuentes over the edge and he hooked both players on the hour, replacing them with youngsters Kieran Morgan and Alfie Lloyd. Afterwards Cifuentes again used his press conference to make pointed remarks about data, and that he’s been very clear with the club since the summer that this team is short in numerous key areas. If these substitutions were a further point to the suits sitting behind him, it paid off for him immediately when Koki Saito showed what can happen when you do miss the first defender with a corner – Ben Gibson, flat and leaden footed in his own six-yard box, turned into his own net.

Look, this was better, but it’s a bit like Finland’s warmest day. It could scarcely have been worse than Middlesbrough. There were positive in the performances of Koki Saito, and centre back Liam Morrison who I thought stepped onto the opposition well rather than hanging off and backing off as our defenders are too prone to doing most of the time. He was positive and aggressive. Looked well up for it in the conditions. You want a job of work doing on a day like this, get a Glaswegian involved.

QPR were chaotic, clunky, but you couldn’t fault the effort. It didn’t look like a team not playing for its manager. It’s just, this is how good this QPR team is. Not a great side when everybody is fit, and five of the first teamers currently aren’t. Not good enough to beat a mediocre Stoke side, missing its best midfielder, at home - or anybody else here for that matter. It still does ridiculous things, like Harrison Ashby randomly catching the ball four yards inside the field of play erroneously believing it had gone out. You’ve still got Zan Celar playing an hour of Championship football and touching the ball 14 times, one of which was his missed penalty. Cannon, for comparison, played the same role in the away side and managed double that, which included five shots and four on target. Rangers again looked better for having Alfie Lloyd up front, whose skillset is limited to pushing the ball past defenders and asking them questions about how quick they are, then sticking his shoulder in and asking questions about how strong they are. That’s it. And that’s a vast improvement, which caused Stoke several problems late on.

We end, as I’m afraid we must, with the penalty miss once more. There are no goals in this QPR side, even when given a free hit from 12 yards it cannot find its own arse with both hands. It has scored twice in three home games, both own goals. Opposition players are now Rangers’ joint top scorer at home this season, with two. Marti Cifuentes’ side haven’t scored more than one goal in a game in 12 attempts. They’ve failed to score at all in five of those. They’ve only scored more than one goal in a game twice all season – both in August at Sheff Utd and Luton. They haven’t scored more than two in a game since the home win against Leeds in April. They haven’t scored at all in their last four away games. The last time they’d done four away games without scoring was 14 years ago, in February 2010. They have the worst shot conversion rate in division – 6.45%. Only Michael Frey (three) and Nicolas Madsen (two) have scored more than one goal. Nobody has scored fewer goals than QPR in the league. QPR have spent just 5.2% of their Championship matches leading this season, 9% fewer than any other side (Plymouth second-fewest with 14.3%). Right back Jimmy Dunne has more touches in the opposition penalty area this season than any other QPR player.

We’ve now played two of the division’s poorer sides at home in games where Gavin Ward seemed to be deliberately trying to make up for years of torment at his hands by giving us every decision he could, and from those we’ve taken just two points.

The comparisons with 2000/01, the last time QPR were relegated from this division, continue to stack up. That a season in which we scored 45 goals in 46 games and drew 19 times.

Links >>> Ratings and Reports >>> Message Board Match Thread

QPR: Nardi 8; Dunne 5, Cook 6, Morrison 7 (Fox 77, 6), Ashby 5; Varane 6, Field 5 (Andersen 77, 5); Smyth 6 (Paal 71, 6), Madsen 5 (Morgan 61, 5), Saito 7; Celar 3 (Lloyd 61, 6)

Subs not used: Santos, Dixon-Bonner, Bennie, Walsh

Goals: Gibson og 62 (assisted Saito)

Yellow Cards: Field 22 (foul), Fox 80 (dissent), Ashby 90+4 (foul)

Stoke: Johansson 8; Wilmot 6, Phillips 7, Gibson 5, Bocat 5; Seko 6, Sibibe 6 (Thompson 75, 5); Manhoef 5 (Rose 91, -), Jun-ho 6, Koumas 5 (Tezgel 72, 5); Cannon 8

Subs not used; Bonham, Vidigal, Dixon, Ennis, Stevens, Tchamadou

Goals: Cannon 24 (assisted Bocat)

Yellow Cards: Johansson 79 (dissent), Thompson 86 (foul)

QPR Star Man – Paul Nardi 8 Not a good sign to be bottom of the league, with one win in 16 games, the league’s worst home defensive record, and your goalkeeper is the player of the season so far by a street.

Referee – Gavin Ward (Surrey) 5 Currently second to Nardi in that race.

Attendance – 15,688 (1,740 Stoke) The booing of Zan Celar as he trudged off the field for his substitution was a brutal moment on a human level. It’s not his fault he’s not good enough for this level, or that we’ve recruited him believing the opposite. Otherwise, the crowd stuck with its team, and pointedly its manager. Marti Cifuentes seemed to make a point of doing a full lap of the pitch at full time, beating the his chest and thanking the fans for the response. That, and his post match press conference, has us awaiting some white smoke in W12 once again. Judging by the reaction here, the general consensus seems to be the club is about to point the gun at the wrong person, again, having given the gun to the wrong person, again.

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