Celtic To Raid Southampton Football Club Tuesday, 24th May 2016 10:30 In recent years Saints have been the ones buying players from Celtic, but now after appointing Brendan Rodgers as their manager it could be all about to change. Brendan Rodgers drove a hard bargain with the Celtic board before he accepted their offer to manage the Glasgow club, but it can be revealed that much of the negotiation centred around the former Liverpool manager's obsession with all things Southampton. Initially contract talks were delayed whilst Brendan checked out whether there was a direct flight between Glasgow and Southampton and also which other airlines had a flight path that went over St Mary's, with security now watertight at Saints training ground at Staplewood and his previous favourite tree cut down, he has to consider all options including viewing opportunities from the 10.30am Virgin Atlantic Gatwick to Orlando flight which passes right over Marchwood just after 11am. Also he wanted a top deck cabin for all of Harmony Of The Seas voyages from Southampton, as he had heard that you can see Staplewood as you sail down Southampton Water. Another demand was an innocuous three bedroom semi in Pooks Green preferably with a periscope. A demand that was turned down though, was his request for the Super Hoops to be the Super Stripes next season, he wanted red & white stripes, when that was declined he went for red & white hoops, which again was turned down and he eventually had to accept that Celtic as one of the most iconic clubs in Europe will not compromise their famous kit end of, Saints executives take note. But having agreed personal terms it was then down to what Celtic would allow him to do in the transfer market, he was straight to the point with a list of players that he wanted, the full list we have had leaked to us by a Celtic insider and is as follows. Forster At this stage the Celtic board were rather puzzled as there did not seem to be a lot of variety in the list, when asked if he had any other players that he might be interested in Rodgers replied Martina At his stage the Celtic board were a little concerned, but they had gone too far down the line by now to not offer him the job and so announced to a waiting World, OK Glasgow ! OK half of Glasgow ! that their new manager would be Brendan Rodgers. Rodgers was then paraded in front of the press and we have an excerpt from that press conference. Q. When do you start Brendan ? BR, Immediately I have a waiting taxi to take me to the airport for a flight to Southampton, I hope to be outside Staplewood by 9am tomorrow morning. Q. Do you have players in mind for next season ? BR. Of course I read the Daily Echo website hourly. Q. No holidays for you then Brendan ? BR. I'm hoping to sneak in a bit of a working holiday actually ? Q. France for the Euros then ? BR, No a week at Lepe Q. What managers do you most admire ? Jock Stein must be an influence BR. I don't look much past Ted Bates. Q. Will you be taking in much of our wonderful architecture in Glasgow. BR. Once you have seen the Bargate and West Quay Centre you have seen it all. Q. What about rumours linking Celtic with Simon Ferry at Peterhead, any substance ? BR. The only Ferry I need goes to Hythe Q. Would you consider any player if he hasn't played for Southampton ? BR. No ! Q. Have Rod Stewart and Billy Connolly contacted you yet to wish you luck ? BR. No but Craig David & Pete Devereaux once told me to F**k off at the Eling toll bridge. Q. Well good luck Brendan and may God and his Holiness in Rome be with you ! BR. Thanks but all I need to be with me is Celtic's cheque book in Southampton. So there you have it, will Brendan continue his obsession for all things Southampton ? Will Celtic realise sooner than later that they have signed a man with a bigger sense of his own importance than even Chris Evans ? Find out the answer to all these questions and more in the coming weeks. Competition Time. Have you spotted Brendan Rodgers in Southampton, he has already arrived in the City yesterday evening, we want your sightings, preferably with a photo. The winner will receive an autographed photo of Dejan Lovren's penalty miss in Instanbul. Staplewood. - Southampton FC training ground, a former tree overlooking it now cut down, was Brendan's home for two summers. Marchwood - The suburb in which Staplewood is situated, also famous as a location for a Priory Hospital which Paul Merson once stayed at. Hythe Ferry - As iconic as the Staten Island Ferry, although slightly smaller than the Titanic almost as accident prone as it crashed into Hythe Pier last week. Lepe - An area near Marchwood with a beach, from here you can watch something brown steaming out of Cowes, thats the Isle of Wight ferry. Eling Toll Bridge - a small medieval toll bridge a couple of miles from Marchwood, long since bypassed. Craig David - A popular singer from Southampton Pete Devereaux - Once one half of the Artful Dodger the early 00's hit duo who hailed from Southampton, once wrote a letter to the Echo complaining that I slagged off Rupert Lowe too much on here, only the second time a famous "rock star" has felt it neccessary to complain to a newspaper about my views. NB Bono was the first when I likened left back Lee Todd to the U2 singer in the bar of the Bedford pub pre match in 1997, not realising that Bono was drinking up the other end. Rod Stewart - A singer who last made a decent record in 1976. Billy Connolly- A comedian who can be funny, I do like his travel shows and have been to the same museum on route 66 he visited trivia fans. Bargate - A medieval miniature castle type thing in the centre of Southampton, Luftwaffe proof. West Quay Centre - Modern 21st century shopping centre we are all very proud of down here, I would recommend the burrito place in the food court for any visiting Celtic fans. His Holiness the Pope. The catholic version of the Archbishop of Canterbury & The Monarch. Popular in one half of Glasgow. Rome - Italy, nice place for tourism, dodgy place to go to for football. Harmony Of The Seas - Latest super liner to dock in port of Southampton, you are not allowed to tocuh it in case it falls over such is its height, even Peter Crouch cant touch the top. Photo: Action Images Please report offensive, libellous or inappropriate posts by using the links provided.
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