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What do you do when your 2021 wedding is cancelled due to Covid-19 all whilst the devious plotting and scheming of a hostile takeover of a League 2 football club goes very baldy (sorry badly) wrong?
Rearrange your wedding!
God bless our Captain Sabotage, Alexander Jarvis - he has done it again. He's turned from our supergrass to travel agent!
This wedding is just like a David Bottomley end of season awards do. No children allowed.
The happy couple want no gifts, only our attendance and love explaining: "Your loving presence at our wedding to celebrate our special day is all we need and is the best gift you could give us.
How did this very happy couple meet?
Drunk and desperate at 3am on Boxing Day.
It all began the same as all great love stories… fate, coincidence and drunken nights out. Then David Bottomley called Alexander Jarvis who couldn't keep his big mouth shut......
The summary:
Matt and Jade met in the beautiful city of Manchester when they were both leaving the same nightclub at 3am on Boxing Day, and after a few smooth chat-up lines later (I’ll let you guys guess who’s the smooth talker!) BBM pins were exchanged and the rest is history. It might not have been the typical Romeo and Juliet set-up but it has exceeded any classic love story. It’s been over 10 years and after two beautiful children, a house renovation, A COUPLE OF FOOTBALL CLUBS and years of endless love and support for each other, it’s finally time for these two to say… I do.
The Wedding Schedule: Matt and Jade joyfully request the pleasure of your company as we share our vows and join in marriage in the presence of dearest family and friends. Both the ceremony and the reception will be held at the same location which will remain a surprise for all guests. Transport to the event has been arranged for all guests, the pick up point will be in Via Ludovisi, by Hotel Hassler.
Fat Pat loves a good cry at a wedding. She's packing her bags and her camera to see who she might be able to see at such an illustrious event. Matt might have spurned Fat Pat's greasy barms but she's happy he has found true love.
Dress code
**PLEASE NOTE THE BRIDE HAS REQUESTED THAT THE WEARING OF FOOTBALL SHIRTS IS MANDATORY**
To avoid any kit clashes please note that the bride will NOT be wearing white.
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 19:38 - Jun 26 by RAFCBLUE
One couple no longer on the Rome guest list for Matt and Jade are Jamie O'Hara and Elizabeth Jayne Tierney.
Despite quite a lot of football industry guests, the former Spurs player's name is mud in the Southall/McManus household because Jade is jealous that Matt's first true love was not her but "Miss Elizabeth" and Matt has Premier League footballer envy. Add to that that O'Hara and Tierney are no more following a 7 year relationship that recently ended:
Now what relevance does all this have to our favourite hair transplant fanatic and his upcoming wedding?
The Mail Article points out that Tierney called out on Instagram: "when you catch somebody lying, they be madder than you"
Jade has been checking up on Matt and his "antics".
When the truth comes out, Jade is going to be mad, Matt. Very mad. Very very very mad.
James McManus is also going to be mad, Matt. Very mad. Very very very mad.
It's probably time to be honest with Jade, Matt. Get your version of events to her before Charlton and Dale fans do.
We know the TV programme is called "Don't Tell The Bride". but that's not going to work next weekend, Matt.
6 days to go until meltdown; Charlton and Dale fans can't wait.
“Such statements lead the ordinary person to understand that Mr Southall has deliberately sought to acquire unmerited possessions and then engage in dishonest conduct in regard to the same”
What, like DVDS from a former high street retailer or summat?
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Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 20:14 - Jun 26 with 8240 views
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 19:55 - Jun 26 by kel
“Such statements lead the ordinary person to understand that Mr Southall has deliberately sought to acquire unmerited possessions and then engage in dishonest conduct in regard to the same”
What, like DVDS from a former high street retailer or summat?
Beats robbing Pic'N'Mix I suppose, kel.
Fast forward to Saturday afternoon:
Before you are joined in matrimony, it is my duty to remind you of the solemn and binding character of the vows that you are about to make.
Marriage in this country means the union of two people, voluntarily entered into for life, to the exclusion of all others.
What's Matt not told Jade do we think?
George Bernard Shaw had it right:
"He who can does; he who cannot, teaches."
https://www.visittheusa.co.uk/
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 19:38 - Jun 26 by RAFCBLUE
One couple no longer on the Rome guest list for Matt and Jade are Jamie O'Hara and Elizabeth Jayne Tierney.
Despite quite a lot of football industry guests, the former Spurs player's name is mud in the Southall/McManus household because Jade is jealous that Matt's first true love was not her but "Miss Elizabeth" and Matt has Premier League footballer envy. Add to that that O'Hara and Tierney are no more following a 7 year relationship that recently ended:
Splendid vacation in Italy planned. Seeing it kick off at a wedding isn't unusual in Rochdale so will be an amusing bit-part to the holiday. Conversations with Charlton friends even more interesting with the O'Connell transfer. Can't wait :D Get your proxy votes in ASAP. #UTDNFS
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Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 07:48 - Jun 27 with 7729 views
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 00:05 - Jun 27 by Sandyman
Splendid vacation in Italy planned. Seeing it kick off at a wedding isn't unusual in Rochdale so will be an amusing bit-part to the holiday. Conversations with Charlton friends even more interesting with the O'Connell transfer. Can't wait :D Get your proxy votes in ASAP. #UTDNFS
See you at the Piazza di Spagna Sandyman!
George Bernard Shaw had it right:
"He who can does; he who cannot, teaches."
https://www.visittheusa.co.uk/
Purely by coincidence I'm writing this in our room at the Savoy Hotel on Via Ludovisi. Might pop down the road to "one of Rome's top 5 star hotels" to check whether the blushing bride has checked in yet.
Would anyone like me to pass on a message if I happen to bump into the happy couple?
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Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 09:21 - Jun 27 with 7628 views
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 08:45 - Jun 27 by DorkingDale
Purely by coincidence I'm writing this in our room at the Savoy Hotel on Via Ludovisi. Might pop down the road to "one of Rome's top 5 star hotels" to check whether the blushing bride has checked in yet.
Would anyone like me to pass on a message if I happen to bump into the happy couple?
"Would you say hair transplants are value for money and improve your quality of life?"
George Bernard Shaw had it right:
"He who can does; he who cannot, teaches."
https://www.visittheusa.co.uk/
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 23:33 - Jun 27 by RAFCBLUE
"Would you say hair transplants are value for money and improve your quality of life?"
Fat Pat says it not long now for Matt and Jade; the big reveal of surprises is going to mean a mega weekend on the streets of Rome.
Bride is all excited.
Groom is nervous. Nervous about his hair falling out. Nervous about numerous creditors. Nervous about Charlton fans in Rome. Nervous about Dale fans in Rome. Nervous about the truth.
We are all looking forward to a massive party.
Bring your best paintball game Matt.
It's going to be Red from the Addicks vs Blue from the Dale and beamed around the world on Instagram.
And then Jade is going to get told what's really been going on. Infidelity is a terrible thing Matt.
George Bernard Shaw had it right:
"He who can does; he who cannot, teaches."
https://www.visittheusa.co.uk/
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 23:30 - Jun 29 by kel
I’m hoping it comes out on DVD, I know of a bloke that sells them cheap.
It's almost a life of what could have been for Matt because everything he's touched has failed.
Failed at Woolworths. Failed at ice hockey Failed at football Failed at school Failed in football agency Failed in modelling Failed with Elizabeth Tierney Failed with Arabella Failed at Villa Failed at Bolton Failed at Charlton Failed to sue his builder Failed to make it in London Failed to be cleverer than Chris Farnell Failed against Simon Jordan on Talksport Failed against CAST - Charlton Athletic Supporters Trust
Even his hair couldn't stand him and got out early.
Bless Jade Mcmanus for doing her bit for the downtrodden and needy.
Dragging him to Rome for a game of outdoor paintball is a genius idea.
Have you ever tried to get red paint out of a light coloured suit?
George Bernard Shaw had it right:
"He who can does; he who cannot, teaches."
https://www.visittheusa.co.uk/
I do hope you're right RAFC Blue....I walked past a few top notch hotels up there during the last few days. I'm sure that Fat Pat has everything under control.
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Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 20:34 - Jun 30 with 5974 views
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 16:24 - Jun 30 by DorkingDale
I do hope you're right RAFC Blue....I walked past a few top notch hotels up there during the last few days. I'm sure that Fat Pat has everything under control.
Well it appears that the blushing bride is still in Worsley - leaving it a bit late to travel to Rome?
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Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 20:57 - Jun 30 with 5885 views
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 12:29 - Jun 30 by DorkingDale
I hate to say it, but i don't think the wedding is happening this weekend.
Well if it's happening, it will be without her Dad. He's just tweeted a photo catching the Metro into Manchester for a few pints. She's been posting a lot of stuff on her At Home Instagram page for the last couple of days too - not conducive with imminent wedding.
Hey ho - nice to have a few days in Rome though.....
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Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 14:49 - Jul 2 with 5368 views
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 14:00 - Jul 2 by DorkingDale
Well if it's happening, it will be without her Dad. He's just tweeted a photo catching the Metro into Manchester for a few pints. She's been posting a lot of stuff on her At Home Instagram page for the last couple of days too - not conducive with imminent wedding.
Hey ho - nice to have a few days in Rome though.....
And the wedding planner remains unpaid.
Any fool have a party when they think it is somebody else might be paying the bill.
Any fool can create a website which suggests something that isn't true.
A good job we all took screenshots of all the lies:
Matt and Jade met in the beautiful city of Manchester when they were both leaving the same nightclub at 3am on Boxing Day, and after a few smooth chat-up lines later (I’ll let you guys guess who’s the smooth talker!) BBM pins were exchanged and the rest is history. It might not have been the typical Romeo and Juliet set-up but it has exceeded any classic love story. It’s been over 10 years and after two beautiful children, a house renovation, A COUPLE OF FOOTBALL CLUBS and years of endless love and support for each other, it’s finally time for these two to say… I do.
Given weddings the take place in the UK are a matter of public record it's not too hard to find out if someone really is married.
Looks like Matt and Jade were either publicly b*llshitting again, one of them got cold feet or money was too tight to mention.
Southall needs to be wary of Daddy Mcmanus dropping him in it too - he's got a mouth as loose as Captain Sabotage, especially after a few beers. Quite a few City fans follow Dale too.
Wonder where Southall and Mcmanus moved to after 264 Leigh Road, Worsley......
George Bernard Shaw had it right:
"He who can does; he who cannot, teaches."
https://www.visittheusa.co.uk/
It's wedding prep day today in Hale following the July 2022 Rome wedding that wasn't.
Using a laser than a James Bond villain would be proud of, Jade had the barnacles scraped off the hull of the boat to look her best for the upcoming special day.
Fat Pat is looking forward to it and getting her legs waxed again, her bikini line thinned for a second time and is down to half a portion of chips with the beef pudding to ensure that she fits into the dress for the upcoming nuptials of Charlton's Code Red Dossier star turn and his wannabee influence bride to be.
Of course, its not Rome this time. Times are hard.
The Charlton lot, disappointed that the Kat was let our the Bag last time are keeping their away strip very close to their chest.
But Jade Katy has a sneaky grass in her midst. Don't worry folks its not Captain Sabotage this time but someone who is very keen to see the special couple tie the knot and let others who would like to wish them well on the day see them tie the knot.
So come one, come all.
Football fans, friends, family, unpaid creditors and HMRC and celebrate the special day of the happy couple.
"That's my skin afterwards, I don't look too scary."
Fat Pat was explaining in the Chippy at lunchtime that she does hope the groom turns up. It's not unusual with a bridezilla for the bloke to think if he's doing the right thing.
And at least HMRC will know where Jade Katy is so they can ask her about 17 Media Limited's unpaid taxes:
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 20:29 - Jan 23 by RAFCBLUE
Blimey O'Reilly!
It's wedding prep day today in Hale following the July 2022 Rome wedding that wasn't.
Using a laser than a James Bond villain would be proud of, Jade had the barnacles scraped off the hull of the boat to look her best for the upcoming special day.
Fat Pat is looking forward to it and getting her legs waxed again, her bikini line thinned for a second time and is down to half a portion of chips with the beef pudding to ensure that she fits into the dress for the upcoming nuptials of Charlton's Code Red Dossier star turn and his wannabee influence bride to be.
Of course, its not Rome this time. Times are hard.
The Charlton lot, disappointed that the Kat was let our the Bag last time are keeping their away strip very close to their chest.
But Jade Katy has a sneaky grass in her midst. Don't worry folks its not Captain Sabotage this time but someone who is very keen to see the special couple tie the knot and let others who would like to wish them well on the day see them tie the knot.
So come one, come all.
Football fans, friends, family, unpaid creditors and HMRC and celebrate the special day of the happy couple.
"That's my skin afterwards, I don't look too scary."
Fat Pat was explaining in the Chippy at lunchtime that she does hope the groom turns up. It's not unusual with a bridezilla for the bloke to think if he's doing the right thing.
And at least HMRC will know where Jade Katy is so they can ask her about 17 Media Limited's unpaid taxes:
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