QPR go in search of their first away win in 13 attempts at the Stadium of Light on Tuesday, against a Sunderland team that has only won twice at home.
We live in strange times. Not a million miles away from this, QPR’s thirteenth attempt to register so much as a draw from an away match this season, Steve Harmison has been appointing manager of non-league Ashington. That’s Steve Harmison, former England fast bowler of 63 test caps and 226 wickets taking over a football team from a Northumberland mining town that previously spawned the Charlton brothers and Jackie Milburn.
At the other end of the sport we have Nigel Pearson, a man revered by Leicester City fans for guiding them back to the Premier League and restoring pride in their club, is behaving erratically. There was the level-headed, reasonably, though-through "fuck off and die” response to a supporter behind the dugout who dared to criticise his bottom-placed team in a defeat to Liverpool before Christmas, now the exceptionally weird incident where he pinned Crystal Palace’s James McArthur to the ground during their most recent home defeat playfully, playfully, playfully and then not so bloody playfully after all. "What went on there, why did you do that?” Pearson was asked. "I can look after myself, don’t you worry about that,” he said. A padded room awaits.
One member of Leicester’s Thai-based board fired him on Sunday evening, and then another one reinstated him. In the meantime Sky Sports News reported his departure as fact, later having to row-back on their latest "too good to check” one sourced story that turned out to be a load of bollocks. "We’re not sure what’s changed in the last two hours,” said one beleaguered reporter on Sunday night. Maybe nothing changed, maybe you went too soon. "Contrary to widespread reports…” said another. No love, just your reports. All the while Sky Bet had been taking money on the next Leicester City manager. That channel’s behaviour, particularly with the betting element, continues to warrant far more coverage, and far less indulgence, than it gets from British football journalists and supporters, apparently so thirsty for the latest transfer rumour they don’t care how well sourced it is or whether it’s completely fabricated.
And then there’s QPR, who have played 11 times away from home in the league this season and lost all 11. If you include a shambolic evening at Burton Albion in August, when Harry Redknapp refused to play a single youth team graduate, even those with extensive loan experience at higher levels than Burton play, then it’s 12 played, 12 lost, six goals scored, and 27 conceded.
Rangers have also developed a worrying tendency to concede heart-breaking late goals in home matches: against Liverpool they went 2-1 down and eventually lost 3-2 with goals after 90 and 95 minutes: three points at home to Swansea was turned into one by Wilfried Bony’s late strike; and then against Southampton at the weekend Saido Mane won the game in the ninety third minute. The four points lost would lift Rangers above Hull, Burnley and Villa.
That QPR are still in touch with the teams above them — they move out of the bottom three with a win here — is almost as miraculous as Sunderland being fourteenth having won only four times this season.
The Mackems have been criticised this season for dull play. They’ve drawn seven of their matches 0-0, including a home FA Cup game against the worst Fulham team since only 4,500 people went to watch Fulham play home games. At home they’ve won two, drawn six. Last season’s seat-of-your-pants survival and trip to the League Cup final, during which they won twice at Old Trafford and once at Stamford Bridge, hasn’t hailed a bright new beginning as much as another chance to scrape into seventeenth place by the most boring, pragmatic route possible.
Southampton’s winning goal on Saturday came a minute from the end of added time. In the remaining 60 seconds QPR managed to win a free kick to deliver into a packed penalty area, recover the clearance and sling in another cross, challenge the goalkeeper when he fluffed his lines, and bundle the ball home for a harshly disallowed equaliser. Against Swansea, having sat back and defended for the final half hour, the R’s piled forward after conceding and managed to draw an extraordinary save from Lukasz Fabianski denying Charlie Austin a winner at the death. Against Liverpool having equalised in the eighty sixth minute and conceded in the last, Rangers found it within them to equalise after 94 before losing anyway.
The point I’m making here is that when the situation is desperate, and there is no choice but to attack, QPR and Sunderland are dangerous. Last season Connor Wickham suddenly started scoring goals, and Sunderland were able to beat Jose Mourinho’s Chelsea at Stamford Bridge. Why, therefore, go back to the cautious, deep-lying, draw-is-always-a-good-result negativity that infests the bottom two thirds of the Premier League? Why not sling it up there, go hell for leather, pack the penalty box? When late goals have created a desperation for a QPR goal this year they’ve either got one or gone remarkably close to it. So why not play like that all the time?
Watching the Premier League is a frustrating experience, particularly the teams outside the top six or seven. Newcastle v Stoke on Sunday a prime example of two teams with nothing to worry about, and everything to play for, going through the motions, serving up a Sunday spectacle akin to a senile old vicar mumbling through his sermon, and both absolutely fucking delighted to walk away with a draw that neither boosts nor harms their league position.
QPR’s problem away from home, Sunderland’s problem in general, football’s problem at the highest level in this country, is they’re thinking too much, analysing too much. Chris Ramsey says "there’s a psychological element” to the constant away defeats. Just bloody go for it for goodness sake. Lose 4-3 if you’re going to lose. Whenever QPR have gone all out for a goal this year they’ve got one, or had it disallowed. Why not play like that all the time?
Where’s Kevin Keegan when you need him. We’re now arriving at Darlington. Twelve away defeats, and still travelling. Come on You R’s.
Links >>> Entertainment value — opposition focus >>> Defoe the catalyst — interview >>> Sheron’s Easter resurrection — history >>> Atkinson. Again. Referee
Martin Rowlands tucks home an equalising penalty for John Gregory’s QPR team on this ground in 2007. The R’s were busy staging a great escape from relegation while Roy Keane was spending big money promoting Sunderland back to the Premier League. Both accomplished their mission, although Rangers eventually lost this one 2-1.
Elsewhere: A special midweek round of fixtures placed here for the sole purpose of catching out the few people who are still half paying attention to their Fantasy Teams, and to persecute Chelsea, clogging their fixture list and hindering their chances still further as part of the o0ngoing grand conspiracy against them. Big Racist John and the Boys will attempt to hold free-scoring, water-tight, high-flying Everton to a brave draw at "the Bridge” on Wednesday.
There’s a "game that matters” in the meantime though, with The Men of Liverpool Collectively Together as One at home to Harry Kane on Tuesday. Both are attempting to chase down Southampton whose inevitable fall from the top four is being hampered by their propensity to win away matches — four in a row now. The Saints welcome Big Sam’s Big Fat Brand of Entertaining Football on Wednesday night.
For QPR fans there’s a potential thriller to watch out for between Tigers Tigers Rah Rah Rah and Aston Villa on Tuesday while Burnley go to Louis Van Gaal. Leicester probably need to decide whether Nigel Pearson is the manager or not before they go to Arsenal for a sound defeat. That only leaves Palace v Newcastle, Stoke v Runners Up Man City and West Brom v Stoke to get the wife beaters out of the house for the night.
Referee: Martin Atkinson is back in charge of a QPR game for the first time since Boxing Day, when he awarded Arsenal a definite penalty which they missed and later evened it up by giving the R’s a nonsense spot kick which they scored. He also sent off Olivier Giroud for a daft head butt. That was about the best return QPR have had from a referee who hasn’t been particularly kind to them during recent times. A full list of his misdemeanours can be found here.
QPR: Sigh. The 3-1 defeat at Stoke means it’s now 11 straight defeats in away league games, and 12 in all competitions, for QPR as they continue to set club and league records for incompetence away from Loftus Road. The 43 goals they’ve conceded so far is the worst record in the division, and 27 of those have come on their travels — Burnley are next worst with 22. Rangers have scored six times in those 12 road games, and four of those were from Charlie Austin who is suspended for this one. Rangers are without a win in eight and have lost the last five.
Prediction: Reigning Prediction League champion WestonSuperR tells us…
"With no Austin it will be very interesting to see who Ramsey picks. It could even work in our favour as Austin up front hasn’t produced a single point away point as of yet and one of our better away performances was at Everton when he was banned. I say go for it and put Zarate and Vargas up there - no point trying to scrape a draw it is wins we need now. That is where any sort of positivity ends and on the back of 11 straight road defeats and without our top scorer it is hard to honestly predict anything other than another loss. Add it the fact we will either see Hill or Ferdinand in Central defense and that only adds to that likelihood.
"Sunderland have been in reasonable form recently and look stronger up front now they have Defoe, so I think they will nick it be the odd goal or two.”
John’s Prediction: Sunderland 2-0 QPR. No scorer.
LFW Prediction: Sunderland 1-0 QPR. No scorer.
The Twitter @loftforwords
Pictures — Action Images