| Corny Joke Warning 16:56 - Aug 29 with 805267 views | Boston |
What vehicle do electricians prefer to drive?
A Volts Wagon. |  |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 20:13 - Jan 6 with 10179 views | NordicR |
How do you drive in South Wales?
Very Caerphilly. |  | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 20:32 - Jan 6 with 10152 views | CateLeBonR |
| Corny Joke Warning on 20:13 - Jan 6 by NordicR |
How do you drive in South Wales?
Very Caerphilly. |
How do you drive in North Wales?
Rhyl-ly Caephilly. |  | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 00:18 - Jan 7 with 10020 views | Boston |
Two tourists up from London decide to stop for lunch in Llanelli.
When the waitress approached, one of the tourists leans over and asks her if she'd mind settling an argument they were having by pronouncing where they were very, very slowly.
Duly the waitress stoops down and says..
Burrr....gurrr...King. | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 10:26 - Jan 7 with 9816 views | Sonofpugwash |
Sad news: After 7 years of medical training, my good friend has been struck off after one minor indiscretion.
He slept with one of his patients and now can no longer work in the job he loves. What a waste of time, training and money. A genuinely nice guy, and a brilliant vet. |  |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 15:50 - Jan 8 with 9467 views | Toast_R |
I see David Beckham's 2nd son has signed for Brentford. Apparently when he arrived at training, he asked the coach "What number shirt am I?"
The coach said "Wear four out there Romeo…” |  | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 11:37 - Jan 10 with 9253 views | johann28 |
What's the difference between ignorance and apathy?
I don't know, and i don't care |  | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 11:42 - Jan 10 with 9228 views | loftboy |
I don’t like elevator jokes, they’re wrong on so many levels. |  |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 14:37 - Jan 10 with 9102 views | Sonofpugwash |
Apparently if your electric car breaks down you can still use the AA.
For smaller cars you can use the AAA. | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 16:48 - Jan 10 with 9020 views | Lblock |
| Corny Joke Warning on 11:42 - Jan 10 by loftboy |
I don’t like elevator jokes, they’re wrong on so many levels. |
Really? I find they give me a real lift |  |
| Cherish and enjoy life.... this ain't no dress rehearsal |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 18:41 - Jan 10 with 8923 views | NewBee |
| Corny Joke Warning on 16:48 - Jan 10 by Lblock |
Really? I find they give me a real lift |
How much lower can these elevator jokes go?
We need to choose a floor. | | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 22:54 - Jan 10 with 8807 views | Lblock |
| Corny Joke Warning on 18:41 - Jan 10 by NewBee |
How much lower can these elevator jokes go?
We need to choose a floor. |
That's a question for one of our resident ladies.
She's not about at the moment
You can (in a Northern accent) eskerlator pal | |
| Cherish and enjoy life.... this ain't no dress rehearsal |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 10:53 - Jan 11 with 8617 views | Sonofpugwash |
David Beckham's son made his debut for Brentford B team last night.
The manager handed him the number 4 shirt.
"Wear four out there Romeo" | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 17:35 - Jan 15 with 8377 views | Boston |
Kilt
It's what happened to the last English bast@rd who called it a skirt. | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 19:18 - Jan 16 with 8021 views | qprphil |
I asked old Maud how she lost her husband and she told me her sad story.. " Well he needed a blood transfusion, but his blood type was not on record, so the doctors asked me if I knew what it was, as they urgently wanted to know, in order to save my Norman's life.
Tragically, I've never known his blood type so I only had time to sit and say goodbye.
I'll never forget how supportive my Norman was. Even as he was fading away, he kept on whispering to me, "Be Positive, B Positive,"
That was my Norman! always thinking of others." | | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 00:45 - Jan 17 with 7866 views | Boston |
I'm so sick of millennials and their attitude.
Walking around like they rent the place. | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 00:49 - Jan 17 with 7862 views | Boston |
Last time I travelled over for a game I was taken ill at the airport.
Doctor told me it was terminal. [Post edited 17 Jan 2023 0:50]
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| Corny Joke Warning on 02:03 - Jan 23 with 7456 views | Boston |
How many deaf electricians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Watt? | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 10:02 - Jan 26 with 7157 views | CateLeBonR |
Lizard?
Lizard?
Lizard?
Lizard?
Is there a Gecko in here?
(Courtesy of George Thomas in the goalkeeper training video on the offish at 9:00) | | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 12:02 - Jan 26 with 7075 views | Orthodox_Hoop |
Two burglars are robbing an off-licence. One turns to the other and asks "Is this whiskey" ?The other replies, "Yeah, but not as wisky as wobbing a bank" |  | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 18:53 - Jan 27 with 6739 views | CamberleyR |
A bloke rang me up the other night and said, " I'm the dandy highwayman who you're too scared to mention, I spend my cash on looking flash and grabbing your attention."
I tried to tell him he had the wrong number but he was adamant. |  |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 09:21 - Jan 30 with 6487 views | johann28 |
My really difficult mate has just completed a Ph.D. on the history of palindromes.
Now we just refer to him as Dr. Awkward. | | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 01:39 - Feb 1 with 6255 views | Boston |
A mate of mine was getting concerned about his wife's hearing.
He spoke to the doc about it explaining he was a little embarrassed to mention his worries and was there any way he could test her without her knowledge?
Doc says yeah, stand about 40' away and ask a question in a normal tone and volume. If that doesn't provoke a response, keep moving 10' closer until she does reply.
Later that evening he's sitting in the living room, figures it's about 40' and asks his wife, who's in the kitchen, what's for dinner, love?
No answer.
Gets up, walks to the other side of the room and asks the same question.
Silence.
So, he moves into the hall and tries again.
Nothing.
Seriously worried, he stands right behind her and in a slightly aggravated tone poses the same question.
She turns, stares at him in frustration and says, "for the fourth bloody time, I'm making a beef stew"! | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 19:39 - Feb 1 with 5970 views | Boston |
Around my way, it's become quite acceptable for a man to have 'work done' in an effort to remain youthful looking.
When Arthur down the street told a few of us that he used Botox, no one raised an eyebrow. | |
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| Corny Joke Warning on 16:10 - Feb 3 with 5788 views | qprphil |
Say what you will about women, but I think turning one sentence into a six hour argument takes talent.
Paddy is doing some roofing work for Murphy. He nears the top of the ladder and starts to feel shaky, and dizzy. He calls down to Murphy and says, " I tink I'll have to go home. I've gone giddy, and feel sick." Murphy asks, " have yer got vertigo Paddy?"
Paddy replies, " no, I only live around the corner. | | | |
| Corny Joke Warning on 07:48 - Feb 19 with 5370 views | BlackCrowe |
I'd love to live in a world without plagiarism.
You may say that I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. |  |
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