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QPR's cup wagon rolls on - Report
Wednesday, 24th Aug 2016 19:34 by Dave Thomas

Is QPR’s much-talked about cup record about to change for the better? A Kick Up The R’s editor was one of the few who braved Tuesday night’s home match with Rochdale to find out.

Back in the day, when QPR took cup competitions seriously and could be expected to send out pretty much the same team for a midweek cup-tie (regardless of the status of the opposition) as had featured in the league the previous game, millions of youngsters tuned in religiously on a Saturday morning to listen to Junior Choice, hosted by the affable Ed ‘Stewpot’ Stewart.


Junior Choice did exactly what it said on the tin, featuring song requests from children. For the most part, these were a mix of novelty songs: Sparky the Magic Piano, Terry Scott’s My Brother, Bernard Cribbens, Danny Kaye, Phil Harris, the list went on; or popular television themes: Morecambe & Wise singing *Bring Me Sunshine*, *Fireball XL-5*, *White Horses* by Jackie, and so on.


One novelty song which often featured was a jaunty little ditty by the New Christy Minstrels, called Three Wheels On My Wagon - telling the increasingly perilous journey of a pioneer family being chased by Cherokees, while the wheels on their wagon fall off one by one. (Have you got a hint by now of where this is going in relation to QPR? Yes, I thought you might...)


There are one of two rather interesting pieces of trivia associated with this song. First and foremost, the music was composed by Burt Bacharach, as in ‘The’. Three Wheels On My Wagon was first released as a single by Dick Van Dyke, but the version most commonly played is by the New Christy Minstrels. It features the vocals of Barry McGuire, who is better known for his darker, almost dystopian hit in the late 1960s, a jolly little number called Eve of Destruction. The New Christy Minstrels also launched the singing career of country giant Kenny Rogers and Kim Carnes, she of Bette Davis’ Eyes.


For some unknown reason Three Wheels On My Wagon starts at that point - just three wheels intact. Whether the wagon began its journey through Indian country fully wheelus intactus is not made clear, but listeners join the song with one wheel having come off and the wagon limping along on the remaining three. Not that George, the narrator, is particularly perturbed by this. In fact, the very opposite. As arrows fly past his head and flaming spears burn his ears, George is higgity, haggity, hoggety high, singing a happy song. Even when the remaining three wheels on his wagon come off one by one and he is finally captured by the Cherokees, he remains cheerful in the face of life-threatening adversity, singing to what is an unspecified end - and even getting his captors to join in, higgity, haggity, hoggety high. And to think, old gits like me pour scorn on the Pokemon generation. Well, that’s what passed for entertainment back in the day, with genial Stewpot and requests sent in by old-fashioned letter.


And so to the second round of the EFL Cup, the only one of the three major competitions whose list of winners on its trophy bears the name of Queens Park Rangers Football Club. If all these references to old radio programmes and even older songs have gone completely over the head of many, if not most of you doggedly sticking with this report, I’m on much surer ground in believing that every last one of you will be aware of the events surrounding the first Saturday in March 1967, at Wembley Stadium, when QPR not only created one of the biggest shocks in football history by coming from behind to beat West Bromwich Albion 3-2, but simultaneously wrote themselves in to the record books as the first team from any third tier ever to win a major tournament, not just in England but the whole of Europe. It was such an unprecedented achievement that the promise of a place in the Inter-Cities Fairs Cup for the winners that year was swiftly withdrawn, the rules (apparently) not allowing such a lowly team to compete in Europe. For some reason that didn’t seem to apply to the frequent non-league winners of the Welsh Cup.


There are some football fans, many in Oxfordshire, who seem to be under the impression that QPR made a second League Cup Final - under sponsorship of the Milk Marketing Board - some time in the mid-1980s. I have carried out thorough and exhaustive research on this one, and can categorically state that QPR have made just one League Cup Final appearance in their history, in 1967. What I think has happened here is that, over the years, many have got confused with the 1985/86 season when Rangers did progress a long way in a competition that came to an end at the semi-final stage, QPR beating Liverpool 3-2 on aggregate, with the Final itself mysteriously never being played. To this day, no-one knows why.


Now, having started the season so well, with two wins out of two, five goals scored, none conceded, it’s fair to say that the wheels had well and truly come off QPR’s (band)wagon by the time Rochdale fetched up at Loftus Road, looking to repeat their 2-0 win in the same competition four years ago. Defeat at Barnsley, with no real complaints at having the rug well and truly pulled under us against a good footballing side, was followed by an abysmal home defeat to Preston - a game no-one of a hooped persuasion was higgity, haggity, hoggety highing their way home from afterwards, by all accounts.


I say ‘by all accounts’, because rather fortunately as it turned out, work commitments (in Preston of all places!) meant I had to miss only our second home game of the season. My own resolve for the long round trip to Loftus Road for a lowly cup-tie against Rochdale might have been dampened had I sat through the full 90 minutes against Preston, but I didn’t, so it wasn’t.


Perhaps it’s because of 1967 and all that, or maybe it’s just my natural cheery optimism flying in the face of all known evidence, but I do like a cup game. It saddens me to see bigger clubs, our own included, all too often treat cup-ties as an inconvenience; it also mystifies me as to why both cup competitions have been devalued to the extent they have these days, especially as the rewards for doing well in one or other can be measured tangibly.

It isn’t just the clubs. Supporters, too, across the board, have largely opted out of the early rounds at least. That was very much in evidence around Loftus Road here against Rochdale, a much smaller crowd than in the previous round in attendance and only a handful of away fans. Unlike against Swindon, the Upper Loft was closed this time, with only the Lower Loft and South Africa Road open for business. Temperatures had been in the high 80s all day and showing no signs of dropping at kick-off; and while it was a pleasant evening for watching football, it can’t have been much fun playing in that kind of heat.


A few months ago, you’d have got shorter odds on any combination of scenarios featuring two or more of Lord Lucan, Elvis Presley, Shergar and the Loch Ness Monster than those of the almost forgotten Sandro ever again wearing a QPR shirt - and even longer odds on his scoring twice in the game. Yet here he was, a surprise inclusion in a strong-looking line-up.


Also making their QPR debuts were Osman Kakay, notionally a defender, but here playing in midfield, and Polish international Ariel Borysiuk. Both did well without tearing up any trees. As he did against Swindon, Matt Ingram started ahead of Smithies, with JFH going with a back four of Perch, Onuoha, Hall and Bidwell, with the Wily Khayati and Shodipo providing the width, and Washington playing alone up front. It was very evident that the balls up to Washington were intended to play to the strengths that had served him so well at Peterbrough and which had persuaded QPR to part with £2.5m for his services. So far, it’s fair to say Conor Washington has not lived up to expectations, but playing off the shoulder of the defender, trying to muscle openings for himself, as he was here at least gave hope is far from lost with him.


Rochdale took an early lead, capping an eventful opening five minutes, in which Rangers might have been ahead and the visitors already minus their first choice goalkeeper. The goal wasn’t exactly sparkling defending, Matty Lund heading home in a crowded penalty-area, and it was a lead Rochdale were to hang on to until shortly before half-time, as yet another wheel threatened to come off for Rangers.


At first, that cause appeared not to be helped by El Khayati picking up a back injury, forcing him to go off after two bouts of prolonged treatment. He had alone looked the liveliest player in a hooped shirt thus far; but it was the introduction of his replacement, Tjaronn Chery, that began to make the difference Rangers needed if they were to avoid yet another cup-tie ending in humiliation. Almost immediately Sandro buried a Chery corner crisp and low into the Rochdale goal, to send the teams in level at half-time.


The second-half proved mainly one-way traffic, Rangers well on top but wasting several good chances to give the scoreline a more comfortable look to it. Luongo and Polter replaced the two debutants, and it was pretty much a case of waiting patiently for one of those many chances to go in and then avoid any costly mistakes at the other end as Rochdale looked more intent on holding out for extra-time. But they paid the price of poor defending when Sandro grabbed his second goal of the evening, a decisive close-range header when left totally unmarked. It was enough to put Rangers into the giddy heights of the third round, with very few anxious moments in the time that remained.


It was a workmanlike, rather than a spectacular performance, deserved in the end, and with one or two positives to take from it, not least of all some lovely skilful touches by Olamide Shodipo. And it was a happy home support that left the ground at the end of the game, pleased and relieved to be in the next round - and very much on a higgity, haggity, hoggety high that, with a second successive win in the competition, we are now officially on a cup run. Like Sandro scoring twice to get us to this point, wonders will never cease and I, for one, am singing a happy song - Cherokees or no Cherokees in wait just around the corner in round three.

Links >>> Message Board Match Thread >>> Ratings and Reports

QPR: Ingram 6; Perch 6, Onuoha 6, Hall 7, Bidwell 6; Borysiuk 7 (Luongo 6, (61)), Kakay 7 (Polter 6, (73)), Sandro 8; El Khayati 7 (Chery 7 (40)), Shodipo 7, Washington 7

Subs Not used: Smithies, Grego-Cox, Comley, Paul

Rochdale: Logan 6; Rafferty 6 (Andrew (5, (78)), McGahey 6, Canavan 6, McNulty 6; Lund 7, Allen 7, Cannon 7 (Mendez-Laing (6, (62)), McDermott 7; Henderson 6, Thompson 6 (Davies 6, (63))

QPR Star Man — Sandro 8 The two debutants will be pleased with their contributions, while Shodipo showed some great skill, more so as the game progressed. It was a much better showing by Washington, though he needs to be finishing more clinically than he is at present. Chery and Polter made a big difference when they came on, but really there is only one candidate here and that’s Sandro. So he should have been really, given his background. It wasn’t a midfield masterclass befitting a Premier League player and Brazilian international, but on occasions he looked different class on the ball, and no faulting the way he took his two goals. It will almost certainly prove his swansong at QPR, but at least it goes a small way towards the money he has cost the club these past two years.

Referee - Dean Whitestone 8 Having booked Sandro for talking out of turn, he was consistent in eventually pulling out a yellow card for Lund following a prolonged talking to. Overall, he handled the game well and was largely anonymous throughout - although, in my opinion, he could have done more in clamping down on the niggling trait of the Rochdale forwards in holding on to the ball when it was dead and then dropping it just out of reach. It’s so annoying, very unsporting - and Karl Henry, in particular, is guilty of it a lot. It’s behaviour that could easily be stamped out with a warning at first and a yellow card to finish.

Attendance 3,928 (150 Rochdale) A small attendance, in keeping with the trend of cup competitions at this early stage, not just at QPR but at most other run-of-the-mill ties. Football is an expensive hobby, and it would be a nice gesture if games like this were included in the price of season tickets. Rochdale fans, too, were far lower in numbers than last time, proving once again the attraction of visiting a ‘new’ ground to football supporters.


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distortR added 21:21 - Aug 24
Thanks for the report yet again, if not the ear-worm!
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TacticalR added 21:52 - Aug 24
Thanks for your report.

No mention of Rolf Harris? Perhaps just as well.

I listened to the game and was actually a bit worried at the end as we seemed to be getting so many chances and not putting them away. Overall it sounds like the positives outweighed the negatives (which is good after the Preston game) and that some of the newer players acquitted themselves well. It looks like we are persevering with Washington - I am keeping an open mind about him and just hope our perseverance pays off.
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GloryHunter added 23:21 - Aug 24
Thanks Dave. Nice bit of writing. Can't believe you drove down from Manchester to see and report on that game. You're a legend.
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GetMeRangers added 01:01 - Aug 25
Thank you Dave. Great report and the pain of watching the Rs limp out of cups, as I expected them to do here following the ragged performance against Swindon and the abysmal Preston game meant I stayed away. Looking forward to the Sunderland game and hoping that we not only have a decent crowd but also put out a strong team.
Its the hope that kills...
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Roller added 06:43 - Aug 25
Thanks Dave.

By some bizarre coincidence, that song popped into my mind on Monday - I even Googled the lyrics!

I wouldn't get too excited by the next round. Sunderland may not be the most daunting opposition, but we will be facing 7 matches in 22 days - the poor little loves will never cope.
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stevec added 08:28 - Aug 25
Ha ha, love that analogy. Should be our anthem.
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francisbowles added 10:13 - Aug 25
Thanks Dave, great report and I knew what you were on about. I did learn things I never knew about the New Christy Minstrels though!
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18StoneOfHoop added 12:35 - Aug 25
Cracking report Dave, you lovely lovely lovely..still classically 70's barnetted..man.

Forget everyone else who have had good stabs at filling in for North eg Lewis Jones,only wanna read your reports when the dear leader has time out from now on.

Memo to self..must buy more AKUTR's and a subscription for my brother in USA too... he enjoys reading it on the crapper.

Always wishing Dave Thomas well...18 (Olly,the big pissed up Hoops cyclist)
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QPRski added 13:33 - Aug 25
Dave - thanks for a very enjoyable read.

A very original and entertaining introduction, plus a neat match report and analysis.
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CroydonCaptJack added 13:47 - Aug 25
Great read thanks Dave
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olderR added 13:52 - Aug 25
Nice to think back to Childrens Favourites.
I always liked Max Bygraves "You're a Pink Toothbrush I'm a Blue Toothbrush" myself!
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extratimeR added 21:33 - Aug 25
Thanks Dave!

Great memories, Jesus, I listened to all that lot in the 60's!

Yes, it is a mystery that supposed "game" against Oxford.

Joke continued with rumours that most of their "team" departed for Liverpool soon afterwards.

I actually enjoyed game, Shodipo very good, gentleman next to me in F Block thought Sandro played very well, ( I noticed he had five Rhodesian passports, and left just before the end after shaving his moustache off).
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HantsR added 07:33 - Aug 26
Very enjoyable report thanks. Paragraphs re children's favourites were read avidly and with some familiarity as I have been re-living those songs with playlists I've made for the grandchildren. Amazingly they love " gillygillyossenfeffercatzenellenbogen by the sea"
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pedrosqpr added 10:54 - Aug 26
Is there any connection between Sandro and puff the magic dragon , now then now then whoops that wasn't stewpot that was the other geyser.. Enjoyed Tuesday night at loftus road
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