Newly promoted QPR return to the Premier League on Saturday, starting off with a home fixture against Hull City.
As QPR prepare to embark on a second attempt at cracking the modern day Premier League, I can’t help but feel a little tinge of sadness.
At 12.45 tomorrow Louis Van Gaal kicks off against Swansea City and at 15.00 our beloved QPR start all over again against Hull City. And as soon as that ball is nudged off the centre spot, and the first tackle is made, and the first goal is scored, and the first results are in, then it has all begun again and what went before matters a little bit less. The relentless nature of the sport means successes cannot be dwelt on for long, and that’s a shame because what happened on the last Saturday in May at Wembley Stadium should be treasured forever.
The last time I saw QPR in competitive action was at the national stadium, in their first visit since 1986, and they scored in the very final minute, despite being reduced to ten men, to win 1-0. I’ve watched the goal every day since. I can still see, in the bright sunshine down below me, Junior Hoilett delivering a dreadful cross, Richard Keogh plating it up for Bobby Zamora, and that ball curling so exquisitely into the corner of the net. It’s all still there, and fresh, like it happened yesterday. I love it. Being asked to start again, and forget all that, is like the morning alarm piercing that dream you have sometimes where Kelly Brook comes in with the chocolate mousse. Come on, please, five more minutes.
In other sports — snooker, tennis, golf, darts — people retire after that sort of thing. What’s the point in carrying on? Everything there is to see has been seen, everything there is to achieve has been achieved. What? Do you think we’re going to go to Wembley with QPR and, in front of 36,000 clad in blue and white hoops, score a last minute winner with ten men again? That’s it mate. These are the good old days. It’s never going to be better than that.
The summer has progressed much like any other. When you moderate a message board like the one attached to this site for a decade you can almost do away with your desk calendar and know what date it is by the posts — fixtures day, complaint about the delay in the television fixtures being released, mild concern at lack of signings in June, genuine worry at lack of signings at the start of July, out and out blind panic at number of signings by end of July, worry about whether the season ticket will arrive in time, all interspersed with gross over reactions to players apparently staying or leaving (they’re rarely doing either) as Sky Sports News HQ (they’ve rebadged it you fool) tosses shit at the wall 24 hours a day and hopes that some of it sticks. I’ve felt completely detached from all of it. What are these people worrying about? QPR scored a last minute winner at Wembley with ten men. In the last minute. At Wembley. QPR. My QPR. Our QPR. At Wembley. With ten men. Pardon me for not lying awake at night fretting over the whereabouts of Leroy Fer, or whether we’ve got enough cover in attack won’t you?
But, sadly, we do indeed have to kick off again tomorrow and consign that glorious day, easily the best of my life, to the text books. Just another game, another change of divisions, in the history of Queens Park Rangers. In 50 years time whichever chump is doing the equivalent of this job will look down the club’s complete record and note only that QPR beat Derby 1-0 and B Zamora scored after 90. That’s all it will amount to, in the end.
The general consensus seems to be that Rangers were lucky to win that match. Lucky that they had more money to spend than the rest of the division put together, lucky they had Charlie Austin all season, lucky that they scored right at the end of a match Derby dominated. The debate about whether being perfect defensively is any less worthy, or less skilful, than having more of the ball and attacking, is for another day.
Where I will accept QPR were lucky is in bouncing back, because although the newly relegated teams are always the favourites to go straight back up, and we’ll see it happen more and more now the Premier League TV money has moved from ridiculous into downright unfair while the Championship has restricted what its clubs can spend, it’s not easy. The punishment for financial and football mismanagement on the scale of QPR 2012/13 is usually far more severe than a single season in the division below — just ask Leeds and Nottingham Forest, two far "bigger” clubs than QPR who are yet to return after a decade away from the top division thanks to chronic incompetence not unlike that which Rangers last time we played in this league.
If we really must start again, rather than basking in the warm glow of what happened in May for the rest of time, then what we want to see is lessons learnt and the same mistakes avoided. The arrivals of Steven Caulker, Jordon Mutch and Mauricio Isla look promising. They’re younger, better and fitter than anybody QPR bought 24 months ago. They have resale value and they’ve been purchased with a specific style and system in mind. As long as Rio Ferdinand is more Ryan Nelsen than Jose Bosingwa, QPR have done good business, and there are easily three worse teams than them in this year’s Premier League, particularly if Loic Remy stays and plays.
The intriguing element is the late addition of Glenn Hoddle to the coaching staff. In theory, he’s exactly what QPR need. For far too long Rangers have turned to the transfer market and loan deals to solve any problems they have. Always another player, always more blood. They’ve never tried to coach and improve the players they already have, which is why you see players like stagnate and in some cases die altogether here. When was the last time QPR bought a player for a couple of million, improved them, enjoyed a couple of great seasons from them, and sold them for a healthy profit? When was the last time they developed a youth player for the first team? Hoddle his highly adept in this area, and QPR have been crying out for somebody just like him for a long time.
This time last year Harry Redknapp added Steve McClaren to his backroom team to almost entirely positive effect. In fact, he did too well, so when he left QPR regressed and the Derby team he joined flew up the league.
There’s more risk to this appointment from Redknapp’s point of view this time around. Hoddle isn’t known to be short of ego and confidence, and while he’s made all the right noises this week it’s hard to imagine somebody of that experience and ability happily coaching away alongside Bondy Bond and reporting into Harry Redknapp. The Premier League coverage is wall to wall on television and in print, and the slightest whiff of anything half resembling a story is seized upon and poured over for days. If QPR start slowly, expect the gutter press to start asking when Hoddle will be taking over from very early on indeed.
But overall there are encouraging signs. QPR have bought well, appointed an excellent coach, fostered a good team spirit, and bounced back at the first time of asking. Hit the ground running in the Premier League and Wembley will be seen as just the start, rather than the end, of something special.
Come on you R’s.
Links >>> History >>> Opposition Profile >>> Opposition Interviews >>> Podcast >>> Referee >>> Season preview part one — the new and the nervous >>> Season preview part two — the middle ground
Dexter Blackstock celebrates in front of the Loft End as his goal seals a 2-0 victory against Hull in this fixture back in 2006/07. The game was John Gregory's first in charge of Rangers. The late Ray Jones scored the other.
Joey Barton and Jordon Mutch will start in midfield, and Charlie Austin will lead the attack leaving two further positions to fill. Ale Faurlin looks like the favourite in midfield, at least initially, and then it will either be Junior Hoilett behind Austin or Loic Remy alongside him.
Hull lost striker Shane Long to Southampton earlier this week and sold Matty Fryatt earlier in the summer to Nottingham Forest. With Yannick Sagbo suspended for the first two games of the season for Tweeting support of Nicholas Anelka’s pathetic Anti-Semitic hand gestures last season, Steve Bruce’s options in attack are limited to Nikica Jelavic and Sone Aluko.
Elsewhere though, plenty of selection headaches with new signings Robert Snodgrass and Tom Ince both tipped for a debut. Bruce praised his fringe players for an impressive display in their final friendly against Stuttgart a week ago and said a number are now pushing for starts.
Elsewhere: Last year it was the Championship. A remorseless, ceaseless, never ending dirge of matches that had to be clumped together in groups of a dozen to mean anything at all. Individual wins, or defeats, mean nothing to anybody when you’re playing Saturday Tuesday Saturday Tuesday Saturday Tuesday every week of every month for the whole year. QPR wore the look of a team that wondered why on earth they were bothering half the time, and you can certainly forgive them for that. The Championship makes Test Cricket look like bunjee jumping.
Now it’s the Premier League, where you play three games in three weeks and then sit out for a fortnight for a vitally important, crucial, round of international friendly fixtures. The rules of this league are simple for clubs like QPR. You cannot possibly win it, or come close to winning it, so forget finishing any higher than eighth. Everybody from eighth down is a relegation candidate so games against them, even on August 16, are absolute "must win” occasions and should your team fail to do that you should take to the message board immediately in a fit of blind panic and commence the search for a scapegoat immediately. All cup competitions should be exited immediately, because they are like a cancer on your league campaign. Even going past round three of the League Cup risks jeopardising your chances of finishing seventeenth in the all important Premier League, and it’s those narrow escapes from relegation after fielding weakened sides in knockout competitions that you want to tell your grandkids about, so let’s not be taking things too seriously at Burton Albion next week eh lads?
With all that in mind, let’s assess what the weekend has in store for us. We start, at 12.45, on the television, with Louis Van Gaal v Swansea City. Now you may think that this is a terribly dull forgone conclusion of a game and you’d be absolutely right. You may therefore wonder why we would want to have this on the television rather than, say, West Ham v Spurs, which will be a competitive fixture between two teams that dislike each other very much. The answer to that is twofold — firstly the country is quickly filling up with scum, and quite a lot of it supports Manchester United, and secondly, Louis Van Gaal is already being hailed as some kind of demi-God whose every word and move must be documented and screened live.
Anyway it’s West Ham v Spurs at 15.00 along with Stoke’s must win home game with Aston Villa, West Brom’s must win home game with Sunderland, Villa’s must win trip to Stoke and Sunderland’s must win visit to West Brom. Newly promoted Leicester host Everton, who are one of the seven at the top end, so they may as well not bother turning up.
The Super Sunday Brunch Spectacular is this week made up of Old Southampton v New Southampton from New St Mary’s at 13.30 and three separate Sky Sports hosts have promised us solemnly that this will be "fascinating” already this week so make sure you’re bright eyed and bushy tailed for all the hyperbole that’s going to entail. At 16.00 reigning champions Manchester City go to Newcastle where last season Alan ‘Pards’ Pardew welcomed the softly spoken, hugely experienced, dignified, likeable new Manchester City manager, Chilean Manuel Pellegrini, by telling him to "shot your noise” and calling him a "silly old cunt”.
On Monday night, expect montages of terraced houses aplenty as Burnley open their campaign with a hiding to nothing at home to Chelsea.
The only game we haven’t mentioned is Arsenal, who will start well and fade, against Crystal Palace, who went from everybody’s tip for midtable to everybody’s tip for the drop in one fell swing of Steve Parish’s ego-laden axe at about 22.00 last night.
Only 37 to go after this. Get me back to that swimming pool.
Referee: If you were hoping that QPR’s elevation to the Premier League might free them of the sub-standard refereeing in the Championship, then for now you can think again because the man in the middle this Saturday has followed the R’s up from the second tier. To be fair, Craig Pawson from Sheffield did ten Premier League fixtures last year and has been knocking on the door of the top flight for some time. His last, and only, QPR appointment was a League Cup win against Accrington at Loftus Road during Jim Magilton’s brief reign back in 2009. http://www.fansnetwork.co.uk/football/queensparkrangers/news/35692/pawson%E2%80% here for more details and stats.
Hull: The Tigers are yet to lose during a pre-season campaign that included five friendlies and two European qualifiers. They drew 1-1 at nearby North Ferriby from the Conference North, where our former charge Adam Bolder is currently plying his trade, and then won 5-0 at Harrogate Town. They then won 2-0 at League Two York City and drew 1-1 with League One newcomers Barnsley before winning 2-1 at German side Stuttgart last weekend. In amongst that they fought their way past Slovakian side AS Trencin in the Europa League qualifiers with a 0-0 draw away from home, in which Tom Huddlestone missed a penalty, and a 201 home win having trailed early.
Betting: Professional odds compiler Owen Goulding is back for another season, and looks ahead to a full weekend of football action on the opening day…
"Welcome back fellow R's, I hope you all have had a great summer and are ready to start paying off those season tickets/memberships etc with some clever punting.
"The season starts with a home game against a Hull City side which performed very well last season, and as such will be a tough start to the campaign for Harry's boys. As always at this time of the season, the ridiculous parameters of the transfer window means having a bet early can often be thrown into disarray with a late transfer one way or another. From a punting point of view, I tend to keep my powder dry throughout August as much as possible as things change at the drop of a car window. Looking at the prices for this game, QPR are slight favourites at 6/4, with the draw at 9/4 and Hull available at 11/5. There is no value here jumping out, the prices feel right.
"Without knowing what team Harry will play its hard to suggest a goalscorer bet, but as I’m suggesting small stakes, I think my recommended bet for the game will be a small interest in the newly employed full backs I expect Harry to start with. Hull conceded 13 goals in their last five league games last season so at massive prices, I think it’s worth having a couple of quid on both Traore and Simpson to score at anytime. Simpson has been given licence to get further forward and I must be mad suggesting backing a player who has failed to score in his previous 100 games. But under this new system, it’s worth taking a chance at a huge price. Keep your stakes small.
- Armand Traore to score at anytime - 12/1 (888Sport)
- Danny Simpson to score at anytime - 25/1 (888Sport)
"Elsewhere my bet of the weekend has to come from the Britannia where like it or not, a tight reign on his spending has seen Mark Hughes slowly change the style and fortunes of Stoke City around. It pains me to say it, but Stoke look a very good outfit now. A mix of pace and strength, with a couple of very skillful players thrown into the mix means a trip to the Britannia will be a daunting task for most sides this season. Villa will be missing main threat Benteke here and Stoke comfortably completed the double over Villa last year. A big home crowd should cheer the Potters on to victory and I’m very surprised to see Evens available currently on Betfair for a home win.”
- Bet of Weekend - Stoke to beat Aston Villa - Evs - (Betfair)
I will be doing my big price goal scorer bets also for this coming season after collecting some lovely returns last year on these - my selections for this week are as follows..
- West Ham v Spurs - James Collins Anytime Scorer - 16/1 (888Sport)
- Crewe v Barnsley - Matt Tootle Anytime Scorer - 16/1 (Will Hill)
- Bournemouth v Brentford - James Tarkowski Anytime Scorer - 18/1 (PaddyPower)
(I will be keeping a running record of profit/loss throughout the season based on £10 total stake on the QPR related bet, £20 on the bet of weekend, and £5 per big price goalscorer bet). So with £45 invested this week, let’s see if we can make some mula.
Prediction: New season, new reigning Prediction League champion to offer his views. Massive thankyou to Mase for his sterling match preview efforts last season, and congratulations to John Shaw/WestonSuperR who took his crown from him last season. If you fancy competing for £50 and a place in this column next season join our Prediction League now. Anyway, onto John’s thoughts on Hull…
"Let me first of all thank Clive for giving me the opportunity to write a paragraph of two on my thoughts and predictions ahead of our matches this season and at the same time apologise to you all for what I’d describe as my realistic/pessimistic views. However I did somehow manage to win the Prediction League in a Promotion season so maybe I am not all that bad.
"If you need reminding, our last two opening fixtures in the Premier League were not hugely successful as we succumbed to 4-0 and 5-0 defeats to Bolton and Swansea respectively, so surely things can only get better. The acquisitions we have made this summer look good — having them all fit to play (I am thinking mainly Isla and Remy here) and quickly gelling together as a team could well determine the outcome of the game. It is worth pointing out that Hull have already had competitive matches in qualification for the Europa League so are a little way ahead of us.
"The good news this week is that Shane Long has moved to Southampton. This is a player I rate and has a knack of scoring against us, the heart breaking late goal in the 1-1 with West Brom last time we were at this level being particularly painful.
"I expect Hull to start stronger with the better pre-season but am sure with the Loftus Road faithful in full voice we can claim at least a point which would be a huge improvement on our last two starts to a Premier League campaign.”
John’s Prediction: QPR 1-1 Hull. Goal scorer - Charlie Austin.
LFW’s Prediction: QPR 2-0 Hull. Goal scorer — Loic Remy.
The Twitter @loftforwords
Pictures — Action Images