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Top Ten Facts About Leeds

Another in the award winning series of articles bringing you all the trivia about our next opponents and to prepare you for the grim reality of another trip past Winchester.

1. Leeds main urban subdivision has a population of 443,247 as per the census of 2001 and the metropolitan area in total numbers 798,000 as per 2011, making it the 30th most populous city in the European Union, if you add Bradford to it then the urban population is around 2.3 million, 4th biggest in the UK however in terms of quality of life it is ranked slightly behind a coalmine on the outskirts of Gdansk.

2. The City Variety's Hall used to b the location for the popular 70's TV series, The Good Old Days which for those of you under 50 was a variety show where the musichall bills of the Victorian era where re enacted and people dressed in clothing in style around 80 years earlier, in tribute to the show which ended in the early 80's the tradition of wearing clothing in a style of eight decades earlier has been continued when Leeds play at home when large concentrations of fashion crazy Yorkshiremen gather to show off the latest trends they have just discovered such as flat caps and braces.

3. Leeds is at the cutting edge of popular Music with bands like the Pigeon Detectives, Gang Of Four and The Kaiser Chiefs all being local celebrities to a select few, although the masses prefer more mainstream stuff like Glenn Miller and the James Last Orchestra, both of whom have recently become popular in the City.

4. In a recent survey in was discovered that the most popular pet in the City was a Ferret, closely followed by a Whippet and then Pigeons, Leeds residents also dont tend to give their pets names as they say it makes it harder to eat them during food shortages etc.

5. The Leeds Service Crew was/is a feared gang of Soccer Hooligans, they were noted for their distinct style of dress that tended to be around ten years behind their rival football firms, their trademark Birmingham Bag trousers and three star jumpers marked them out as trendsetters. Their motto was "We might get done but we never run" this was out of neccessity rather than bravado, the average weight of a LSC member was 23 stone with a waist of 42" so running was not really an option, at least not very far, also the obligatory Yorkshire tradition of having a ferret in your trousers further hampered anyone who was toying with the idea of doing one in the face of superior numbers.

6. The majority of residents of Leeds define themselves as Christian, possibly due to its relatively new introduction to the area, the first missionary only arriving in the City in 1957, he was killed and eaten by the residents, however the COE persevered and eventually by 1961 the 7th missionary established the first church in the City, St Ferrets COE. Religion however is not big in the lives of residents, in a recent survey only 43% could recite the Lords prayer compared to a whopping 87% who could recall the entire McDonalds menu (Both breakfast and normal) including the fat content.

7. Skimmed milk is illegal in some areas of Leeds due to its London Media Luvvy type connotations, as is any other type of coffee other than instant, it is the only City in the Western World not to have a branch of Starbucks. Weightwatchers however is well established in the City, for those people who are concerned that their cholesterol levels are dropping to healthy levels.

8. 89% of all Yorkshire residents have never owned a passport, they have never seen the need to leave the County, indeed only 43% of Yorkshiremen/Women (Sorry for this piece of sexual equality, but wanted to be the first ever person to get the words Yorkshire and Sexual Equality in the same sentence) have ever left their native County and 20% of them say it was by accident due to poor signposting on the Ilkley Moor road and it wont happen again.

9. "You can tell a Yorkshireman, but you cant tell him much" is an old saying that rings true today , those of us that travel to Elland Road should bare that in mind if we find ourselves engaged in conversation with the locals, the best course of action is to agree with him on all of his opinions, its a lot more safer in the long run.

10. Most Leeds residents live in a peculiar style of housing called "Back to Back" this takes the traditional Northern terraced house building style a step further by attaching the houses of the street behind to each other, meaning that there is no back yard (no self respecting Leeds person would ever have a Southern invention like a garden, its always a yard) These houses are becoming trendy with the media professionals who are flocking to the City due to the high commissions to be earned selling the Yorkshire Evening Post on the streets of Leeds and therefore are soaring in price and becoming out of the price range of the locals, recently a two bedroom back to back house went for £18,000 although in fairness it did have a fixed bath and hot water.

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