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What do you do when your 2021 wedding is cancelled due to Covid-19 all whilst the devious plotting and scheming of a hostile takeover of a League 2 football club goes very baldy (sorry badly) wrong?
Rearrange your wedding!
God bless our Captain Sabotage, Alexander Jarvis - he has done it again. He's turned from our supergrass to travel agent!
This wedding is just like a David Bottomley end of season awards do. No children allowed.
The happy couple want no gifts, only our attendance and love explaining: "Your loving presence at our wedding to celebrate our special day is all we need and is the best gift you could give us.
How did this very happy couple meet?
Drunk and desperate at 3am on Boxing Day.
It all began the same as all great love stories… fate, coincidence and drunken nights out. Then David Bottomley called Alexander Jarvis who couldn't keep his big mouth shut......
The summary:
Matt and Jade met in the beautiful city of Manchester when they were both leaving the same nightclub at 3am on Boxing Day, and after a few smooth chat-up lines later (I’ll let you guys guess who’s the smooth talker!) BBM pins were exchanged and the rest is history. It might not have been the typical Romeo and Juliet set-up but it has exceeded any classic love story. It’s been over 10 years and after two beautiful children, a house renovation, A COUPLE OF FOOTBALL CLUBS and years of endless love and support for each other, it’s finally time for these two to say… I do.
The Wedding Schedule: Matt and Jade joyfully request the pleasure of your company as we share our vows and join in marriage in the presence of dearest family and friends. Both the ceremony and the reception will be held at the same location which will remain a surprise for all guests. Transport to the event has been arranged for all guests, the pick up point will be in Via Ludovisi, by Hotel Hassler.
Fat Pat loves a good cry at a wedding. She's packing her bags and her camera to see who she might be able to see at such an illustrious event. Matt might have spurned Fat Pat's greasy barms but she's happy he has found true love.
Dress code
**PLEASE NOTE THE BRIDE HAS REQUESTED THAT THE WEARING OF FOOTBALL SHIRTS IS MANDATORY**
To avoid any kit clashes please note that the bride will NOT be wearing white.
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 20:29 - Jan 23 by RAFCBLUE
Blimey O'Reilly!
It's wedding prep day today in Hale following the July 2022 Rome wedding that wasn't.
Using a laser than a James Bond villain would be proud of, Jade had the barnacles scraped off the hull of the boat to look her best for the upcoming special day.
Fat Pat is looking forward to it and getting her legs waxed again, her bikini line thinned for a second time and is down to half a portion of chips with the beef pudding to ensure that she fits into the dress for the upcoming nuptials of Charlton's Code Red Dossier star turn and his wannabee influence bride to be.
Of course, its not Rome this time. Times are hard.
The Charlton lot, disappointed that the Kat was let our the Bag last time are keeping their away strip very close to their chest.
But Jade Katy has a sneaky grass in her midst. Don't worry folks its not Captain Sabotage this time but someone who is very keen to see the special couple tie the knot and let others who would like to wish them well on the day see them tie the knot.
So come one, come all.
Football fans, friends, family, unpaid creditors and HMRC and celebrate the special day of the happy couple.
"That's my skin afterwards, I don't look too scary."
Fat Pat was explaining in the Chippy at lunchtime that she does hope the groom turns up. It's not unusual with a bridezilla for the bloke to think if he's doing the right thing.
And at least HMRC will know where Jade Katy is so they can ask her about 17 Media Limited's unpaid taxes:
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 23:55 - Jan 23 by DorkingDale
Couldn't make it up.....
Absolute state of her. Made of plastic and getting married to a thief with a complex about his hair (or lack of it). She’ll have melted by 2030 the tramp.
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Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 17:27 - Jan 24 with 4497 views
Good week for HMRC. First the ex-Chancellor of the Exchequer, and now Jady Katy. Only need to ensnare fat balding blokes with ex-CEO on their CV and that's an impressive hat-trick.
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Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 09:42 - Jan 25 with 4331 views
Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 22:10 - Feb 3 by judd
I knew I should've told you I just want to have some fun...
There's a rumour judd, emanating from the missus of an ex-Dale midfielder about the build up to the upcoming wedding and how she thinks it’s similar to a remake of film classic Pulp Fiction.
Same cast, but this time they're all trapped in a house.
Directed by Quarantino
Working title is ‘Tax fiction’ with a cameo appearance from lawyers acting for Barclays Bank.
George Bernard Shaw had it right:
"He who can does; he who cannot, teaches."
https://www.visittheusa.co.uk/
Always worth getting a good wedding photographer in for those pictures that last a lifetime. Christina Wilson does some amazing photos.
Expect the wedding album to have ones with the bride and groom and things like handcuffs, uniforms and people pinned up against the wall - that’s not a description of the post event nuptials - but a description of those authorities waiting outside the venue to serve papers.
Fat Pat is taking her camera too and hopefully get to put those pictures all over Instagram but they won’t be as good as Christina’s
George Bernard Shaw had it right:
"He who can does; he who cannot, teaches."
https://www.visittheusa.co.uk/
Always worth getting a good wedding photographer in for those pictures that last a lifetime. Christina Wilson does some amazing photos.
Expect the wedding album to have ones with the bride and groom and things like handcuffs, uniforms and people pinned up against the wall - that’s not a description of the post event nuptials - but a description of those authorities waiting outside the venue to serve papers.
Fat Pat is taking her camera too and hopefully get to put those pictures all over Instagram but they won’t be as good as Christina’s
[Post edited 11 Feb 2023 14:20]
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Matt Southall invites all Dale fans to Rome for a pre-season special! on 11:47 - Mar 4 with 2741 views
Always worth getting a good wedding photographer in for those pictures that last a lifetime. Christina Wilson does some amazing photos.
Expect the wedding album to have ones with the bride and groom and things like handcuffs, uniforms and people pinned up against the wall - that’s not a description of the post event nuptials - but a description of those authorities waiting outside the venue to serve papers.
Fat Pat is taking her camera too and hopefully get to put those pictures all over Instagram but they won’t be as good as Christina’s
When you open the link but don't hit the arrow to view portfolio, it just scrolls through different images. The second one is a well ridden old bike. Christina's got form.
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