Is South Yorkshire really a republic ? why are people from there called Tykes, I havent got a clue however once again we try to educate Saints supporters so they are able to engage in civilised conversation with our opponents

1. Barnsley is a town 11.8 miles North of Sheffield, 17 miles South of Leeds and 14.5 miles West of Doncaster, nobody in the town has travelled Westwards to find out whats there, as residents still believe that earth is flat and that if they cross the Yorkshire Moors they will fall off.

2. Barnsley is the hub of the metropolitan borough of Barnsley which has 218,000 residents, however the town of Barnsley itself only makes up about 72,000 of that number, of which many live underground after the local council refurbished disused collierys.

3. Snuff is the drug of choice for locals, a delicacy that never really caught on in the South, snuff is a powdered substance which is inserted through the nose and giving a tingling sensation which clears the nasal passages, it was popular with coal miners as it helped clear their breathing after working underground and breathing in coal dust, its now a very expensive habit and local dealers sometimes mix in cocaine to dilute the snuff.

4. The town was built on the coal mining industry and at one time 98% of the population were employed in that industry, although coal mining is now extinct in the area there are still many throwbacks to that golden era in the town, firstly the school leaving age is still 11, hence you will see packs of 12-16 year olds congregating in Barnsley town centre on weekdays as they cant find any work till they are 16, secondly the town used to be 200ft above sea level, now its estimated its down to only 24ft, due to subsidence in the hundreds of mines that are underneath the surface, surveyors recently found that the town was dropping by around 11ft a year and its estimated that by 2050 Barnsley will be more of a lake that a town, scientists are therefore working on developing gills for the locals having already succeeded with the webbed hands experiment.

5. In 2002 Barnsley Council launched an initiative called Rethinking Barnsley, which after a long session of thinking came up with only one idea and that was to change the name to Remaking Barnsley, it could only happen in Yorkshire.

6. You would assume that Barnsley town centre would be of Victorian design, you would be wrong, it was constructed in the 1960's shortly after the town was discovered by missionary's working for the Red Cross in Yorkshire, this was hailed the first major discovery since a unknown tribe of pygmy headhunters was found in the Amazon Rainforests 30 years earlier and Barnsley was declared a World heritage site.

7. The main diet is Chips and its acceptable to augment the portion with fish, steak & kidney pudding or pies, whilst any combination is acceptable, this fare is not legal unless mushy peas and gravy are added, it is illegal for any food establishment to sell its offerings without peas and gravy, even pizza hut have to comply, those dieting will usually have only chips at mealtimes, and then only if they can produce a valid chit from weightwatchers to confirm they are on a diet, then they have on their chips a local sauce called "pea wet" which is basically as it says the juice from the aforementioned mushy peas.

8. For a town of its size Barnsley has been the home of more than its fair share of notable residents, Arthur Scargill, Michael Parkinson, Darren Gough, ex Saints player David Hirst, whose knee injury whilst at the Dell was so bad that he often had to be hhelped out of nightclubs in the City on a Saturday night as he was unable to walk, also Mick McCarthy formerly of Wolves who qualified for Eire due to Barnsley for a time being owned by the newly constituted Republic of Ireland with part of the deal being that they also take Barnsley.

9. Barnsley isnt very rock n roll im afraid, most famous musical exports are heavy metal group Saxon who took the Barnsley look to the capital with a string of hits before heading out on the pub circuit again, other than that Danse Society were a minor goth group in the mid 80's when sales of talcum powder soared in the town, other than that its Brass bands that entertain both old & young alike, the Grimethorpe Colliery band being the best known for its hit album "Sgt Rutters Only Darts Club Band"

10. Barnsley people have a keen sense of humour, as you would expect from a town that produced comedian Charlie Williams and will hopefully become the first set of Saints opponents not to take umbrage with a top ten facts, but treat it with the contempt it deserves rather than the assorted death threats and promises to set various gangs of whippets and ferrets on me that usually accompany a top ten thread about Yorkshire

Photo: Action Images

nobby added 21:28 - Mar 8 footnote: Charlie Williams was originally a professional football player with Doncaster Rovers as Barnsley had enough jokers in their team at the time and during weekdays made up the cast of the popular TV show "The Comedians" to which Charlie was later signed up for.
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ericofarabia added 17:49 - Mar 9 Was bitterly disappointed on my one and only trip to Barnsley (about 3 0r 4 years ago, early in season 2-2 draw) not to see a single whippet, ferret or racing pigeon. Did see a couple of old blokes in flat cloth hats smoking roll ups sat on a bench near the railway station. Think they were ex members of Last of The Summer Wine on a jolly boys afternoon out. To be fair the locals in the pub we were in, in the town centre made us very welcome before and after the game. We managed to avoid being shepherded by OB into the souless sports centre bar.

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