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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs 05:47 - Jun 26 with 19267 viewsFredManRave

It's close season, it's late and it's Friday so what better time to start posting your favourite, original, inventive yet inoffensive insults here;

A couple of oldies from my vault;
Bellend
Knob Jockey

A couple of newbies thanks to LFW;
Weapon
Melter

No offense meant.

I've got the Power.
Poll: MOM from todays Teasing at Teesside?

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 15:48 - Jun 29 with 2369 viewsconnell10

Pisspot swirler

AND WHEN I DREAM , I DREAM ABOUT YOU AND WHEN I SCREAM I SCREAM ABOUT YOU!!!!!
Poll: best number 10 ever?

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 18:26 - Jun 29 with 2332 viewscaptainmycaptian

Fu cktard
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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 22:03 - Jun 29 with 2306 viewsMrSheen

Lummox - Mrs Sheen's favourite
Oaf
Nincompoop
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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 22:18 - Jun 29 with 2295 viewsngbqpr

spanner looks like a clear winner - and rightly so

Poll: Best hug a stranger / fall down five rows / 'limbs' late goals this season

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 22:18 - Jun 29 with 2294 viewsDorse

Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 22:03 - Jun 29 by MrSheen

Lummox - Mrs Sheen's favourite
Oaf
Nincompoop


Is it 'oafs' or 'oaves'?

'What do we want? We don't know! When do we want it? Now!'

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 22:20 - Jun 29 with 2289 viewsMrSheen

Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 22:18 - Jun 29 by Dorse

Is it 'oafs' or 'oaves'?


Only oaves when it's with fishes.
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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 22:25 - Jun 29 with 2284 viewsngbqpr


Poll: Best hug a stranger / fall down five rows / 'limbs' late goals this season

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 11:27 - Jun 30 with 2246 viewsWeaverQPR

Back door bertie

@WeavQPR

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 13:28 - Jun 30 with 2226 viewsR_from_afar

Divot
Donkey
Carthorse
Great steaming nit

Some great insults on this thread and also here, from the good doctor:


RFA

"Things had started becoming increasingly desperate at Loftus Road but QPR have been handed a massive lifeline and the place has absolutely erupted. it's carnage. It's bedlam. It's 1-1."

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 16:42 - Jul 1 with 2196 viewsjohncharles

Is it driving a Volvo that made you a knob or do you have to be a knob before they let you have one ?
Road rage has come on a bit since then.

Strong and stable my arse.

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 18:24 - Jul 1 with 2183 viewsTearsofrage

Heap of primordial slime
W*nkstain -or just "Stain"
Jif or "complete and utter jif!"
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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 20:24 - Sep 15 with 1768 viewsFredManRave

Never seen or heard this one before, until today;

"do one rupert you flounce".

© oddball

About as inoffensive as it gets.

I've got the Power.
Poll: MOM from todays Teasing at Teesside?

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 12:25 - Sep 16 with 1668 viewsEastR

Geebag
Lickarse
Dry shite
Langer

Poll: Is time up for Ainsworth?

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 13:02 - Sep 16 with 1637 viewsderbyhoop

What a shining wit, if you'll pardon the spoonerism.

He's special.

"Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the Earth all one's lifetime." (Mark Twain) Find me on twitter @derbyhoop and now on Bluesky

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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 13:16 - Sep 16 with 1623 viewsBazzaInTheLoft

Me and PaulParker had a difference of opinion on here once, and it escalated to the point where we called each other varieties of fruit.
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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 13:30 - Sep 16 with 1614 viewsbrendan

Broomstick Jockey
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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 20:57 - Sep 16 with 1553 viewsmarkrtid

Gusset

I dont know why but I hate that word. Its like calling someone a cnt.
Its sweating an fishy horrible.
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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 01:00 - Sep 18 with 1470 viewsGaryT

Radish
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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 11:44 - Sep 18 with 1423 viewsqpr85

Spacky tw@t
Spastic
Dribbly
Larry
My favourite when I was growing up bellend used that a lot in school
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Favourite inoffensive insults or put downs on 11:52 - Sep 18 with 1421 viewsstevestrange

I would like to give an honourable mention to "shirt lifter", still makes me laugh.
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