Queens Park Rangers followed the script to the letter at Old Trafford on Sunday — entering stage left then promptly rolling over and dying in front of Louis Van Gaal’s new-look Manchester United to the delight of the watching arm-chair fans.

Sky Sports’ pre-match coverage of Manchester United QPR started at half past three. By the time the game kicked off half an hour later Rangers had featured for just one minute and 12 seconds of the conversation — a minute of which was Harry Redknapp talking about how “‘ard” it would be to play the mighty United. The storyline was written on deadline day — transfers far more important than the actual playing of matches — and QPR had learnt their lines perfectly.

“We can’t show them too much respect,” said Redknapp. Christ on a tiny motorbike only knows what this would have looked like if QPR had fallen into that trap.

Rio Ferdinand took time out from the pre-match build up to absorb the applause of the home fans on their one Old Trafford trip of the season, and receive a plaque to commemorate his 12 years of service at United. He spent the next 45 minutes polishing it.

For half an hour Rangers barely made it out of their half. Lining up on the edge of their own penalty box and accepting what came their way. Faced with wide open legs and come-to-bed eyes, United lubed up and set about the task with lusty gusto.

Swansea won at Old Trafford on the opening day of the season and last season Everton, West Brom, Newcastle, Spurs, Swansea again, Liverpool, Man City and Sunderland were all successful here. Rangers took zero inspiration, and put none of the lessons those who had been before had taught into practise. Other teams have profited from showing no fear, giving no respect, and playing their normal game against United. For QPR, that was too much like hard work. Harry Redknapp has lost all 15 of his matches here as a manager with West Ham, Portsmouth and now QPR, scoring just eight goals and conceding 46. His demeanour before, during and after the game suggested he didn’t think the R’s had a prayer, and the players took to the field with zero belief in what they were doing.

Given the respective resources, and chasm in ability of the two squads, you’d expect QPR to win this match maybe once in every 25 attempts, but behaving and playing like this they wouldn’t even manage that. The body language of the manager, coaching staff and players was defeatist from several days before the game until the final whistle. Despite conceding 70% of the possession, and spending the entire afternoon defending, Rangers didn’t pick up a single yellow card. Not a single foul worthy of further punishment. Devout Catholics have shown the Pope less respect than this.

Rangers sat deep, and tight, and narrow, and hoped for the best. Charlie Austin an irrelevance as a lone striker. After eight minutes Rafael, starting at right back in a reformatted 4-4-2 diamond set up that Louis Van Gaal had reverted to with Chris Smalling and Phil Jones out injured, combined with Ander Herrera to tee up Juan Mata who might have done better had the ball fallen on his left foot but, instead, skied the ball over the bar.

After a quarter of an hour Marcos Rojo was allowed space and time to maraud forwards from the back and his chipped cross would have been converted by Herrera had Robin Van Persie not got in the way. Eventually, QPR debutant Sandro came away with the ball. Rangers were fortunate to have survived that, and weren’t so lucky at the midway point of the half when Clint Hill committed a lazy foul on Herrera that achieved nothing other than presenting a free kick to Angel Di Maria who obliged by swinging in one of those deep crosses that may be headed in, or might drift in at the far post, and in this case did the latter. The whole thing had resulted from Leroy Fer receiving the ball from a rare throw in midway inside the United half and presenting it straight back to the hosts.

There was more to come. Ten minutes before the break Angel Di Maria was allowed to run 50 yards into space in the QPR half. When he was finally forced into a pass he found Wayne Rooney similarly unattended and he squared to Herrera to slide in a second. Before the break Rooney, with Caulker standing off, was able to beat Green at his near post with embarrassing ease — the keeper’s first error of the season. Rangers were three goals down at half time and had a cross four minutes prior to the break - which Rangers left to each other - been converted by Rooney it could have been worse. As it turned out, the England striker was a foot short at full stretch.

You can’t be too critical or expect too much of a newly promoted team, at Old Trafford, with all the money United have spent, and all the players they have to pick from. It seemed ludicrous that as United fielded £150m worth of new talent and steamrollered their opponents into the ground in an embarrassingly one sided contest, that it’s QPR who are being beaten over the head with financial fair play stories at the moment. There was nothing fair or equal about this.

But you also couldn’t help but think there was something for QPR here had they been a bit more positive about everything. Where are Manchester United’s strengths? Attack. Where are Manchester United’s weaknesses? Defence. The logic of sitting back and allowing the attack to play, while not bothering to trouble the defence, is lost on me I’m afraid.

After half an hour, a QPR move into the United half — soiled with unicorn faeces — drew David De Gea from his goal for reasons known only to the Spaniard and created a panic in a distinctly average United defence. Matt Phillips was presented with the ball 30 yards from goal with zero opposition between him and the net but having missed a sitter when 1-0 down in the first away game at Spurs, he once again produced a tepid shot that was cleared from the line with ease.

A moment later Van Persie recognised the danger of QPR running at a shaky defence and deliberately, cynically hacked Junior Hoilett to the ground after he’d turned him on halfway for an obvious yellow card. The Dutchman far more aware of the threat to a United backline that has already conceded seven goals in four games so far this season than QPR were.

Redknapp responded to a score that effectively finished the game with 45 minutes left to play by replacing Clint Hill at left back with Armand Traore, who immediately showed what could be achieved by running at a United rearguard that has changed personnel and shape every week so far this season. His square pass at the end of a positive thrust found Niko Kranjcar, making a second debut for QPR, and should have resulted in a goal. A tame finish from the Croatian was saved by De Gea with his feet. In the next attack the Senegalese full back against reached the edge of the home penalty area unchallenged simply by running forwards with the ball although this time, more typically, he fell over his own feet having got within sight of the goal.

A recurring theme from last season: poor team selections requiring half time substitutions and surgery. Rangers removed Richard Dunne at the break against Spurs when 3-0 down, and here it was Clint Hill's turn. It wouldn't have taken a think tank of the game's finest minds to work out those two ageing old pros may struggle in the positions and systems they were selected in against this quality of opponent.

At the other end, QPR continued to labour under the misapprehension that giving United time and space to play would result in something other than a total shellacking. Rafael and then Mata worked the ball into Wayne Rooney in the area and Green rushed out to save at his feet. Before the hour Mata did succeed in making it four, unmarked at the back post for the worst goal, defensively speaking, of the lot — played onside by Rio Ferdinand. Still, I hope Rio enjoyed his big day back at the “Theatre of Dreams”.

At the midway point of the second half a chipped ball from Di Maria was flicked on by Van Persie but it flew straight to Green and QPR were able to hold the score at four. Radamel Falcao came on for Mata, and Antonio Valencia for Rafael, soon after that and things looked set to get a good deal worse, but United had the game won by that point and mercifully removed their foot from QPR’s throat just enough for breath to be taken for the remaining 20 minutes. Adnan Januzaj, on for the excellent Di Maria in the final eight minutes, twice found himself in space in the QPR penalty area only to choose the wrong option at the crucial moment.

Sandro, thrown in at the deep end after several months without first team football, was overworked and breathing heavily at the base of the QPR midfield. He was replaced by Karl Henry with time running down — hamstring injuries to Jordon Mutch and Joey Barton ruling them both out of action felt keenly by their team mates who completely lost the midfield battle from the first whistle. Daley Blind at the base of a diamond, with Ander Herrera and Angel Di Maria either side of it, were particularly impressive for the hosts, but it would have been hard not to be in the face of such meagre opposition.

Redknapp also gave new Chilean recruit Eduardo Vargas a run instead of Charlie Austin for the final half an hour. Austin spent the day seeing none of the ball at least 30 yards from the nearest team mate at all times, but Vargas did craft one opportunity for himself only to drag a shot wide when offered a sight of the goal as the clock ran down.

The QPR manager bemoaned the fitness of his players afterwards, and continues to lament a poor pre-season spent playing second-rate teams in Germany and Ireland, as if somebody else at the club is in charge of arranging things like pre-season and fitness training. If the pre-season is poor and the players aren’t fit, whose fault is that exactly if not Harry Redknapp’s? Does Mr Bun the Baker book our pre-season friendlies?

In the face of such high quality opposition, with so much new talent making its debut, and the whole country seemingly waiting for the inevitable onslaught, I can’t say I expected anything other than a defeat here. So I come back to a question I asked after the cup exit at Burton Albion where, again, given QPR’s history in that competition, and the team selection, and the priorities this season, I expected a loss: what are we trying to achieve here if it’s not a win?

Some teams, in games like this, sit deep, with banks of five, and well-populated defensive lines, to try and frustrate their way to a 0-0 draw. Others play their normal game, attack, and go for a win, while risking a big defeat. QPR seemed to do neither to me. They picked 11 players, in not much of a shape at all, and let United pretty much do as they liked. No tackling, no attacking, no defending. A minute before kick-off, when you’d want to see some steely eyed resistance and your senior players going around ensuring everybody is focused on their roles, and ready to be right on their game immediately, Rio Ferdinand was collecting a brass plaque from Bobby fucking Charlton. That summed it up for me. Big day out for little old QPR. Zero belief.

The point of shelling out money - £45 a ticket for this one — to watch Harry Redknapp’s QPR side play away games decreases with each trip. Rangers have played 15 away games since Boxing Day and of those they’ve lost nine and failed to score a goal in 11. There didn’t seem to be a plan here to get a win, or a draw, or a goal, or a clean sheet. What should have been a free hit for Rangers ahead of more important matches - in the context of the season — against Villa, Stoke, Southampton and West Ham actually turned into the London side letting Man Utd have a swing.

Why not throw a few punches of our own? The old argument is you leave yourself exposed at the back and can suffer a big defeat, but QPR could scarcely have been more exposed here if they’d turned out wearing only flesh-coloured thongs, and a big defeat came their way anyway. What do we achieve with these meek surrenders, with 30% of the possession, where for long periods we seem not bothered at all and then when we do actually engage in the contest it’s only to keep the score down?

Twice now QPR have rolled over and died in difficult away games, offering no resistance at all. Twice they've dominated home games, winning one and losing the other when they should have drawn at least. The signings look good, and young, and talented, with resale value, and plenty to prove, in positions the Hoops needed to strengthen in. But still the uncertainty remains.

Leroy Fer was an obvious man of the match against Sunderland , and terribly unlucky not to open his account for the year with a 30-yard thunderbastard against the cross bar. At Spurs, he looked like he'd never played the game before. Here, he could be seen jogging back casually as United exploited the space behind him to ram in three first half goals and seal the game.

Have we learnt lessons? Are these players the right sorts? Will we be ok this season, as Redknapp continues to promise? Each passing game provides more questions than answers.

As at Spurs, it’s the manner of this defeat, and the way it was accepted by the players, that concerns more than the loss itself, which was completely expected.

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Man Utd: De Gea 5; Rafael 6 (Valencia 67, 6), Evans 6, Blackett 6, Rojo 7; Blind 8, Herrera 8, Di Maria 8 (Januzaj 82, -), Mata 7 (Falcao 67, 7); Rooney 7, Van Persie 7

Subs not used: Shaw, Lindegaard, Fletcher, Pereira

Goals: Di Maria 24 (free kick, won Herrera), Herrera 36 (assisted Rooney), Rooney 44 (assisted Herrera), Mata 58 (assisted Di Maria)

Bookings: Van Persie 32 (foul)

QPR: Green 5; Isla 4, Ferdinand 4, Caulker 5, Hill 4 (Traore 45, 6); Sandro 5 (Henry 74, 5), Kranjcar 5, Fer 4; Phillips 5, Hoilett 4, Austin 5 (Vargas 59, 6)

Subs not used: McCarthy, Onuoha, Zamora, Taarabt

QPR Star Man — N/A

Referee — Phil Dowd (Staffordshire) 8 A totally uncompetitive game, played with the speed and intensity of a testimonial match, gave the officials a nice easy afternoon out, with very little for them to actually referee. Robin Van Persie’s booking the only incident of note for the man in the middle, and he was right to card the Dutchman for a deliberate foul on a player breaking away into space.

Attendance 75,355 (1,800 QPR approx)

The Twitter @loftforwords

Pictures — Action Images

Photo: Action Images

Jon_in_Oz added 00:38 - Sep 16 I agree with everything you say Clive, it was the manner of the defeat more than the scoreline. If we don't press sides in this league and work hard when we don't have the ball then we are going to get repeatedly beaten away from home. It's not rocket science! Only point I'd add is that I thought both Hoilett and Phillips were really poor and looked to me rather worringly as if they are not PL standard players (given we are short of alternatives). We needed both of them to hold the ball up and help us retain possession but instead they were either tackled or passed to an oppo player every single time. I'm not singling them out because we were collectively poor but their poor performances were key in that we could not get out of our half for most of the time. As much as I think Traore is a liability defensively, he showed the 2 wingers what could be done if you run at the oppo with the ball in a quick and determined fashion. We should start Vargas in one of the forward roles on Saturday and then bring Zamora on for either him or Charlie 2nd half if/when they are knackered. The Stoke game is important now, we need to get back on track but we all know it will be an awkward match.

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AussieRs added 01:00 - Sep 16 Thanks Clive. Fair and entertaining report as usual. I heard someone say that for QPR the Man Utd fixture was akin to a free game - one where we could afford to try things without really worrying about a result that would in all probability elude them. So where was the plan - to either practice defending or attacking? I did not see us really try either - we just rolled over and died. The commentary we got in Oz, Jim Beglin, picked us as clear relegation candidates on the basis of this performance. Hard to argue. Is it possible that Arry is quite prepared for QPR to operate at two speeds - one is lacklustre in games they feel they can't win and the other is more up tempo such as vs Sunderland where they feel they have a chance. Can teams really function like this? Haven't seen Hoilett beat his marker for months, if ever. Disappointed the casual strollings of Niko preferred to Adel for this game at least. I might have to get up early to watch games here but at least I don't have to pay for away game tickets!

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ozexile added 01:40 - Sep 16 Great report. I have never seen a team in all my life like us. We just let teams play around us constantly. No tackling, no harassing, no urgency. One time we lost the ball by their area and their defender casually walked with the ball to the halfway line. Where's the pressure? We'd dropped right back to our box. And I know its a tough life up front on your own but why is Austin flicking balls on? Get your body in front of the defender and try and control I'll leave it there I could go on forever about that performance.

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barabajagal added 01:51 - Sep 16 Couldn't agree more with all that is written here, now someone needs to answer these charges, yet we never get a why. Come on Harry, explain yourself.
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RangerKIK added 02:57 - Sep 16 We were like the Washington Generals to their Harlem Globetrotters. Stooges following a script to make them look good. It was pathetic. As you said Clive Swansea etc had written the book on how to play Man U at their place but somehow we knew better! The crowd was nervous, their players tentative and the manager close to a nervous breakdown. Surely our team talk pre game was. 'Get after them from the get go, exploit this weakness, smash them physically and mentally........but the Redknapp says...... no '2 banks of 5 lads and give them 20 mins to relax and gain confidence, ok.' Pathetic. I am certain we have got a good team here waiting to get out but Harry/Hoddle take the shackles off them and let them play. Please. And can anyone on here enlighten me on this post match comment made by HR. I have studied it from many different angles but end up with what can only be described as an Ice Cream headache. “I thought we’d get in at 1-0, but suddenly there were two more goals before half-time and we were 3-0 down, and I don’t think our keeper had too many saves to make.'' Can anyone help me out here. It is causing me sleepless nights. Come on Rangers if we are going to die lets at least die with our turquoise and lime green polka dot boots on!!!!!!!

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RonisRs added 07:05 - Sep 16 Not sure what to make of it. I thought Niko looked fitter than last year. Its a shame we did not have somone like Barton marshling the midfield. Thank god Traore stayed, Hill is not match at this level.
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Ranger78 added 07:13 - Sep 16 I agree with you report. The stats you've highlighted about Redknapp's Old Trafford visits with "lesser teams" is quite staggering. For me Redknapp is a charlatan, I just cannot believe the myth of him being a top manager and great motivator still exists. I wish we no longer had to put up with the utter disrespect and lack of empathy he shows our club and us as fans. Sadly, for me, this performance was yet another utter embarrassment Of course, we did not expect to win but wouldn't it have been nice to at least try..... Isn't that the point of sport??? Wouldn't it have been nice to come away with a tiny piece of self respect and some confidence for the next game?? Every-time we play a game that he considers to difficult to win or not important, like cup games, he sends a team out with the look of defeat before the game has even started... It's embarrassing and for me shows no great management or motivation skills. Plenty of other lesser teams continue to set examples with performances that include, passion, commitment and sometimes attacking intent. Sure, more often than not, they still loose but at least take something out of the game. Instead, Redknapp's team talk at Old Trafford must have gone something like this " right lads, it's impossible for us to win today so let's not bother using too much energy trying. Let's forget about their weak defence - don't bother trying to exploit that. Just sit back and let their world class attacking players keep attacking us as much as they want! Don't worry about the fans who have travelled up to support us, we'll see the next week at home and we'll try and win that" There is not one single positive to take away from any of our away games so far, not one! Confidence is important in football.., I'm pretty sure some positives from any if these games would have left everyone involved the club feeling better about things.

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pedrosqpr added 07:17 - Sep 16 Congratulations Clive you predicted 4-0 as I did too but since I never bet against my team couldn't cash in. I gave this match a miss having already shelled out for the Spurs match I promised myself no more away matches unless its ground I hadn't been too. I opted to listen to the 5 live commentary and the Utd suck fest commentary team of Green and Savage I didn't bother watching the highlights since they probably looked like the Spurs match so I had seen already. Your assessment was bang on and the only things I would like to add is our season will be defined at home and it seemed Joey Barton was missing Sunday for just his tenacity. Still on Sunday we did what we were supposed to do , the papers got there headlines and the pundits on TV had a w##t and the Man Utd fans happy on the train back to Euston

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QPRski added 07:20 - Sep 16 A much more entertaining and enjoyable report than the actual match with some classic one liners. I particularly enjoyed "Devout Catholics have shown the Pope less respect than this." As regards the technical content - unfortunately there are many home truths!
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steveB66 added 07:34 - Sep 16 Entertaining report, more than can be said of the game. You look at our Midfield and on paper we have more strength in this area by some margin and yet we just couldn't keep the ball. This proved to be our downfall. Watching Hull and West Ham last night, both teams brimming with enthusiasm and intent, full of new players that seem to be fit and raring to go (and scoring!)really puts us to shame. I also agree that with ticket prices away as high as they are in the Prem there is a real danger that our support will start to dwindle if we are to continue in such a benign fashion on the road.

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timcocking added 07:51 - Sep 16 The more i see of Redknapp (and i've never been anti-Redknapp), i'm just not impressed. The wrong squad, the wrong selection, the wrong shape, the wrong tactics.
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terryb added 08:08 - Sep 16 The only part I would query is that you state that other team's play their normal game & ask why we didn't. I think we did. This is the way HR plays. Hoping to avoid defeat rather than trying to win a match.
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M40R added 08:29 - Sep 16 Great report and bang on. For me, I can't get over the three good chances we had. Hoillet and Phillips sank too deep yet paradoxically neither really protected their full backs. Clint is still one of our better centre backs but is no longer a full back, which he openly admitted after West Brom away in our first season back. A real mess.
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probbo added 08:39 - Sep 16 Thanks for the report Clive. I wasn't expecting much from this game but as per the Spurs game, what a limp performance all round - the white shirts of surrender were very apt! We had two weeks to prepare for this game or at least to study the opposition, look for weaknesses that we might try to exploit while trying (if possible) to set the team up stifle the much lauded new players. United's defence has been their weak link and on the rare (2) occasions they were put under pressure did look vulnerable. So we'd have probably been better off lining up with 5 in defence and just hoofing balls in to their box. And while I wouldn't expect Redknapp to do this (or seemingly any) sort of analysis of the opposition what about Hoddle, the supposed master tactician? His contribution so far has not been disappointing. All I can say is respect to the 1,800 who went up there, paid a lot of money for the round trip no doubt and came away feeling woefully short changed again.

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Phildo added 08:58 - Sep 16 I thought there was a game plan. Just it was the wrong one and was executed poorly. The plan such as it was must have been to sit and soak for the first half and then gradually to try and push forward as the game went on. I thought they were most vulnerable if you got at them early - Johnny Evans looked like he was on roller skates. Lack of legs in midfield is perhaps the excuse for not planning a pressing style. Important though to not overreact and the game on saturday like the sunderland is a far better tell.

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PinnerPaul added 09:14 - Sep 16 Spot on report again Clive. Surely now you and others are convinced that JB has to start if fit. Last week you and others said he wouldn't be in your first 11 - I know you don't agree but that's madness IMHO. Cheers Paul
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HastingsRanger added 09:34 - Sep 16 Clive, were you including the advert that Harry featured in as part of the 1m12s of pre-match coverage, as that was probably about as close as he got to preparing the players for this one. Agree with all above, expecting to not compete and lose is a self fulfilling prophecy. It is also dangerous to morale and confidence. If we had come out and played, it would have helped us prepare for these important up coming matches. And would the result have been any worse? Surely, this was a game for Taarabt to figure at some point, as well. I think we have a good nucleus of players at the moment but the direction from above seems poor. As Warnock showed last time, away performances count for a lot, his 3 wins kept us up.

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johnhoop added 09:35 - Sep 16 An excellent report Clive, which as several people have said already provided far more entertainment (for a Rangers supporter anyway) than the game itself. The only problem with reading it was that I'd just about begun to blot it out of my consciousness and your extremely graphic report brought it all back again in its full awfulness .I remember commenting on the match thread that our game plan seemed to consist of sitting back and waiting for them to score and then when they did, waiting for them to score again !

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JAPRANGERS added 09:42 - Sep 16 The only good thing about this game is your report Clive. Superb stuff! The game was live on TV here and when I got to my desk at work today (yesterday was a public holiday) I was greeted by choruses of your team are crap/ really poor/ are they really a premier league team! Thanks Harry.
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CroydonCaptJack added 09:55 - Sep 16 Great report as always.
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Antti_Heinola added 10:28 - Sep 16 Excellent analysis of an embarrassing performance. Not as embarrassing as some of the posters on LFW, though, who are smiling and mystified as to why everyone's so upset at losing to Man Utd and who seem to think we should just roll over against the big teams and reduce our season to about 26 games. At the moment, I'm afraid we look like relegation fodder. A narrow win and decent performance v Sunderland at home should not lull anyone into a false sense of security.

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whittocksRs added 12:26 - Sep 16 I'm quite reassured that Rangers fans on this site agree Little Old QPR are allowed to be criticised if they play like eleven men who've never heard of football, let alone play it to a professional standard. I've been shouted down numerous times this week by other Rangers, accused of 'not being a real fan' and been told Luke Shaw was brilliant against us, hence why we couldn't attack their poo defence.

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cranieboy added 18:15 - Sep 16 Agree with most of the comments. I too was not so unhappy or surprised that we lost, but the manner of it. Its ok to set up deep and hold and break, but you have to get close to the opposition, frustrate them, make them work or do something great to score. We did nothing except sit back, no pressure, no intent. When you consider we actually had three decent chances, probably should have scored two of them, and we never really tried. How much more we might have acheived it we had actually tried and had a go now and again. As said , its not the loss that hurts the most, its the surrender without having a go.

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Burnleyhoop added 19:39 - Sep 16 Painfully accurate Clive. An insipid,gutless performance, devoid of intent or pride. Regardless of the absurdity of picking a player at left back who admitted he wasn't up to the job two seasons ago, we were tactically inept. The most painful aspect of the whole sorry episode is the lamentable attitude shown by Redknapp and displayed by the players, along with the view from the media of our utter failure to put up any sort of a test against the "Galacticos". At least Barton would have made his presence known. Still seething and could rattle on all night. No doubt we'll hear all the usual bullsh*t platitudes about putting things right against Stoke. Embarrassing .

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TacticalR added 21:48 - Sep 16 Thanks for your report. The match was a terrible anticlimax. The whole team looked overawed. We played too many long balls and misshit too many passes. Nothing we did came off. Hoilett probably acquitted himself the best, and that's not saying much. One thing I remember from our previous stint in the Premiership is that a lot of teams had players who could get the ball right in the corner of the net, and that's how United got their second and third goals. By the time of United's fourth goal we had completely wilted.

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